Oh Dear now I have to train and nice cheap eastern european how to do my job

[Lucy]

All non-techies have that fear in my experience. That is why they have such useless things as PRINCE2 and ITIL in order to claim that there is some skill involved.

To quote MPW
'You can put a pig in a suit but you can't stop him from grunting'

[Xenophon]

That is why they have such useless things as PRINCE2 and ITIL in order to claim that there is some skill involved.

I make a very good living out of such useless things!

[DBA_bloke]

To quote MPW
'You can put a pig in a suit but you can't stop him from grunting'

MPW: What a sorry-arsed, typical "look at me" chef he is. The whole "Being a chef is so hard, darling... I don't know how I cope" thing is laughable. I should know, I was a KP for a couple of rising star chefs years ago. They never seem to understand the rather boring truth that all they do is cook food.

They do it well, etc., and nobody likes to be served either rubbish, or late. But, really, the way most of 'em carry on (from the talented MPWs, to the deep-fry everything brigades), you'd think they were saving the world from alien invasion, whilst performing open heart surgery; not making someone's bloomin' dinner. Poncy, poncy wannabe gameshow hosts, the lot of 'em.

[kingshuk]

No doubt there will be some (DA I suspect) who will say "Globalisation is good, blah blah blah, we are all winners."

I fail to see where you directly win in this situation, if that is their argument.

Lucy doesn't win here. Chances are Lucy's replacement and her customers win. Possibly the 'value' of these two wins are more than Lucy's loss Lucy's replacement may send some of her money back home helping that economy (more nuclear tests maybe?). Lucy's customer will use the money saved to invest in something more useful - new IT system/reduce pension deficits/declare shareholder dividend/decrease the cost of product whatever.

Of course, applying their "Globalisation is Good" manta, will naturally mean they are more than happy that Eastern European and African Doctors are being lined up to work in supermarket drop in centres. (Wages to kept at a minimum)....these are going to be very inexperienced Doctors.

Next time you are under the Surgeon's knife, do you want someone with years of experience and top-notch qualifications doing the job, or some el-cheapo 1st year out of Med School trainee ?

Presumably a rhetorical question? Of course everyone will say 'someone with years of experience and top-notch qualifications doing the job'!

What has that got do with this situation? The medical profession is quite well protected in this country through high barriers to entry (unlike PO kind of jobs that Lucy does). Last year's visa rule changes have made it very difficult for non EU doctors to find jobs here .

In any case price of health services is comparatively high here given the results achieved. Doctors are also comparatively higher paid and if the government can find a way to reduce the cost you get a better value for your money (or are you paying yourself only through dividends?)

[sasguru]

However Ayn Rand, Lucy's heroine, would have approved. It's a free and globalised market. Deal with it.

[Lucy]

However Ayn Rand, Lucy's heroine, would have approved. It's a free and globalised market. Deal with it.

sas, refer to my previous comment.

[Lucy]

Oh dear, and now they have her booking meetings for them. Great. What this project didn't need was an admin assistant, if some of the project managers were any lazier, they may as well stay in bed.

Glad I'm going.

dont care don't care don't care

[vetran]

Calm

From bitter experience on both sides of the coin.

They think they are saving money and replacing an obstacle in the project path, we know they are hiring a cheap resource and dispensing with a valuable resource which ensures the projects smooth running.

Show her the filing system & Gantt charts etc using as many industry standard abbreviations as possible explaining them all will take ages and colleagues will get an idea of her level of knowledge. Don't work through the project plans with her, that will be too painful, give her the docs for a part of the project and tell her to come back in 2 -8 hrs when she has studied them and you can discuss questions arising, the risk is you may have an emergency meeting / task which drags it out for 16 hrs while she sits idle, if this happens give her something simple but laborious to do.

Start on the small unimportant projects first so it will be easier to understand the big ones later in the week, you may run out of time but you know its important for her to fully understand the methodology before going over the big projects!

Answer all questions she asks in as few words possible without appearing negative or stroppy, you will be busy ensuring the loose ends are tied up.

Point her to references. So if she asks you to explain nuclear fusion send her to the 'Nuclear fusion expert propeller head forum' so she can get a true understanding rather than about.com.

If she doesn't know basic best practices ask her to research and come back. Do not become a teacher, there just isn't time otherwise you won't cover the whole project scope in the documentation!

Your priority is to make sure everything is documented and apple pie order for when she takes over! You may find this as difficult as resisting a second glass of wine on Saturday night, fight the impulse to succumb to creating a drunken scrawl that will be noticed. Don't skip important highly visible stuff she might need, obviously in the rush you may miss some obscure bits. Obviously in the short timescale you may not complete all the documentation.

Involve as many people as possible in her training so they share the guilt and it takes the weight off you so you can focus on documentation. Unfortunately there is a risk of your replacement getting conflicting views.

Should fill the week in nicely. Don't care if they expand her duties, if you were just about managing and they turn her into a glorified secretary as well she is sure to succeed!

Don't throw the toys out of the pram, you may meet your colleagues again last thing you want them to think is that instead of you appearing to politely help your replacement as much as possible a consumate professional, you are a hormonal whinger. The client may also try and dock your last weeks money, if you are a 'good girl' you may get a few quid extra or get recommended elsewhere.

In the unlikely event it does all screw up you can pop back at double rate evening / weekend to sort it! Or at least you can laugh your socks off when you see your ex colleagues and they recount stories of overruns and stupidity!

Get another contract taking time off as necessary, You may unfortunately find the times conflict with the discussion sessions which drag them out further.

Documentation always gets you through project handovers.

[DodgyAgent]

From bitter experience on both sides of the coin.

They think they are saving money and replacing an obstacle in the project path, we know they are hiring a cheap resource and dispensing with a valuable resource which ensures the projects smooth running.

Show her the filing system & Gantt charts etc using as many industry standard abbreviations as possible explaining them all will take ages and colleagues will get an idea of her level of knowledge. Don't work through the project plans with her, that will be too painful, give her the docs for a part of the project and tell her to come back in 2 -8 hrs when she has studied them and you can discuss questions arising, the risk is you may have an emergency meeting / task which drags it out for 16 hrs while she sits idle, if this happens give her something simple but laborious to do.

Start on the small unimportant projects first so it will be easier to understand the big ones later in the week, you may run out of time but you know its important for her to fully understand the methodology before going over the big projects!

Answer all questions she asks in as few words possible without appearing negative or stroppy, you will be busy ensuring the loose ends are tied up.

Point her to references. So if she asks you to explain nuclear fusion send her to the 'Nuclear fusion expert propeller head forum' so she can get a true understanding rather than about.com.

If she doesn't know basic best practices ask her to research and come back. Do not become a teacher, there just isn't time otherwise you won't cover the whole project scope in the documentation!

Your priority is to make sure everything is documented and apple pie order for when she takes over! You may find this as difficult as resisting a second glass of wine on Saturday night, fight the impulse to succumb to creating a drunken scrawl that will be noticed. Don't skip important highly visible stuff she might need, obviously in the rush you may miss some obscure bits. Obviously in the short timescale you may not complete all the documentation.

Involve as many people as possible in her training so they share the guilt and it takes the weight off you so you can focus on documentation. Unfortunately there is a risk of your replacement getting conflicting views.

Should fill the week in nicely. Don't care if they expand her duties, if you were just about managing and they turn her into a glorified secretary as well she is sure to succeed!

Don't throw the toys out of the pram, you may meet your colleagues again last thing you want them to think is that instead of you appearing to politely help your replacement as much as possible a consumate professional, you are a hormonal whinger. The client may also try and dock your last weeks money, if you are a 'good girl' you may get a few quid extra or get recommended elsewhere.

In the unlikely event it does all screw up you can pop back at double rate evening / weekend to sort it! Or at least you can laugh your socks off when you see your ex colleagues and they recount stories of overruns and stupidity!

Get another contract taking time off as necessary, You may unfortunately find the times conflict with the discussion sessions which drag them out further.

Documentation always gets you through project handovers.

Or alternatively you could just refuse to help her stating your reasons why

[vetran]

Possibly if you have big enough balls. But its a tough call, you need the cash and would have no interest in fighting the agent for your last month's money because you didn't roll over in the last week!

This was based on what had been done to me repeatedly when I have taken over projects, it was meant to be slightly humourous. Note Lucy only has under an hour to go! The last thing you need to do is spend the whole week holding the newbies hand!

This is what I tried not to do when my contract was shipped abroad. I was fairly good in that instance, I did concentrate on the documentation and not teach them how to use UNIX, when they became competent then the documentation should help.

I got a bonus because I helped them so well (after negotiation)! My agent's client was let go as well so he was hardly enamoured with the idea of supporting the newbies.

Doesn't mean I didn't laugh my socks off when I heard about the sub continent replacement's repeated incompetence months later! Or when they asked what tail was.

I have taken over projects where a fag packet would be overkill for storing the supplied documentation this was intentional on the departing persons part.