Ever signed on the dole?

[SueEllen]

Cos I'm a scrounger, layabout, undeserving and to blame for all the problems the country is experiencing.

Do I need to explain? You're not the sharpest chisel in the CUK toolbox so I do understand your special needs wee hugs.

But you haven't been unemployed for 6+ months.

Only then do you fall in that category and need to move to a cheaper place cos your housing benefit is too expensive.

[Cliphead]

Do you still get a UB40?

Do you still have to physically sign on?

Can you sign on by post if you live more than 5 miles from the nearest office?

Is the sound of the giro landing on your doormat on a Thursday morning still one of life's most satisfying sounds?

What's a UB40?

No idea about post.

Paid to current account fortnightly after turning up to have a chat and giving them an autograph.

[SueEllen]

Do you still get a UB40?

[Cliphead]

But you haven't been unemployed for 6+ months.

Only then do you fall in that category and need to move to a cheaper place cos your housing benefit is too expensive.

Personal experience?

[SueEllen]

Personal experience?

This is what I've learnt watching programs like Skint.

Though you don't swear enough....

Do you walk around with a fag hanging out of your mouth? And have boxing as one of your hobbies? Do you sell stolen DVDs?

[Cliphead]

This is what I've learnt watching programs like Skint.

Though you don't swear enough....

Do you walk around with a fag hanging out of your mouth? And have boxing as one of your hobbies? Do you sell stolen DVDs?

I don't have a TV so don't have the privilege of watching reality TV.

Yep I smoke roll ups although not in the server room, boxing isn't compulsory unless some spanner annoys me and I don't sell what I download illegally.

Your point?

EDIT. F**k

[SueEllen]

I don't have a TV so don't have the privilege of watching reality TV.

Yep I smoke roll ups although not in the server room, boxing isn't compulsory unless some spanner annoys me and I don't sell what I download illegally.

Your point?

EDIT. F**k

You weren't the typical unemployed.

Edit: sorry for the mistake

[eek]

This is what I've learnt watching programs like Skint.

Though you don't swear enough....

Do you walk around with a fag hanging out of your mouth? And have boxing as one of your hobbies? Do you sell stolen DVDs?

You would have to be fairly thick to think you can make a living selling DVDs these days whether nicked or not.

As for the 6 months bit will have to look at the rules again. Its age related but you have to be very young to end up in a scheme after being unemployed 6 months. (That's more due to costs rather than other factors though)...

[Cliphead]

You weren't the typical unemployed.

Edit: sorry for the mistake

Is there such a thing? Really?

[NickFitz]

What's a UB40?

No idea about post.

Paid to current account fortnightly after turning up to have a chat and giving them an autograph.

Back in the day, you were given a signing card - it said what day and time you were to sign on, and you had to take it with you so they could find your file from the NI number on it. It was printed by HMSO, and its reference number in the corner was UB40. That's where the band took their name from, and they used the inside of one for the cover of their album Signing Off:

The edges were gummed and it was postage-paid, so when you signed off you could fill it in and pop it in the post to end your claim. But after a few months of signing on the serrations on the edges started to give way, and the gummed bits fell off. Eventually somebody would notice when you signed on and give you a new one. And so the cycle would repeat