What's the worst interview you've ever had?

[northernladuk]

Yeah, but the stories are genuine...aren't they? I particularly like the one with tits out and nipples showing

And the one that wrote **** off on the question sheet which mysteriously disappeared.

[SteelyDan]

And the one that wrote **** off on the question sheet which mysteriously disappeared.

No, on 2nd thoughts the colostomy bag one was the best.

[rapid]

Had one where it was a group interview session, told to read some info that will form the discussion, closing seconds I realise its a 6 page doc, not 1 page then have to blag my way.. got the job on the basis the panel saw my failure, dealt with pressure, extracted what I needed from my peers and formed the best argument etc.. lucky escape.

My last contract in Sydney I sat down to silence with the interviewer.. basically ran the interview myself.. came away confused but got the contract.

Had a few where they tell you 'its in the bag' - 'you've got this' only to not hear a thing back.

Had a pimp tell me he had a candidate crush and he couldn't wait to introduce me to his client, never heard from him again and no return phone calls.. met other pimps excited to put me forward.. again silence - hence I won't bother meeting a pimp ever again unless its a dream job.. or its a her and looks decent on LinkedIn..

[nemosdad]

Interviewed recently with a big 4 consulting the old guy who interviewed me was already pissed off with his contract as he said he was hired as a CIO and now asked to be a simple partner which is like a director or president level, he asked questions straight from ITIL Strategy part of the book and I became sooo p---ed off, I didn't get that contract as I stopped answering the questions after that, but enjoyed nice coffee from the posh coffee shop they have in the ground floor and the car show that was on below their building.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[TheLordDave]

My last contract, sat down for the interview. Did an entire interview with the tech manager. Just before the end his boss comes in, flicks through my cv and asks "I bet you would rather be windsurfing today". I was a bit confused and made a joke of it. He continued to ask me windsurfing questions. Turns out I had been interviewed from someone else's cv by the tech manager. Still got the contract.

[RSoles]

Two,
First, 1980s, looking for a perm role.
STC/STL? Harlow. Interviewed in an abandoned dilapidated office block, no office furniture, we had to sit on upturned rubbish bins. Interviewer was one of those who likes to tell you his project story.
I never got a word in edge-ways. He'd been project manager for <something secret> and wanted to pass the job on to someone (me) to 'take it and make it manufacturable'. From his manner it was clear he'd become bored of the project and wanted to go on to develop something new leaving me to carry the can.
Interview didn't go well...

Second, Scotland, early 2000s, following an introductory tour, 'this is your desk, now get started coding'.
I actually took this contract, good client if a bit quirky.

[SussexSeagull]

Once had a permie interview where the pair of interviews were too clever for their own good. They asked me a logical problem to which I answered only for them to insist I was wrong and no matter how many times I explained it to them they wouldn't accept they were incorrect.

Went Contracting not long afterwards.

[Eirikur]

Just remembered an interview a long time ago just adter I left uni.
Small company, don't even know anymore what it was. The owner an old guy had is office on the top floor for which you had to climb some very long and steep stairs.

It turned out, he used these stairs as a test to see how physically fit the applicants were
As I was panting when I entered his office, I didn't get the job and could leave immediately even before one question was asked

[MojoDog]

Are you sitting comfortably?

Then I'll begin...

Back in February I was contacted by an agency for a gig at a government department at which Crapita has an onsite presence. At the time my security clearance was valid and so I said "yes put me forward". Nothing happened until April when the agent called and said that interviews were scheduled at the end of May.

"OK," I said. "But you should know that my security clearance has now lapsed, will the client still be interested?" Agent said he would find out then called back the next day to assure me that it would not be a problem.

Middle of May and the agent gets in touch to say that Crapita have arranged the interview for a Friday in June at 12:30 and scheduled to last for 1 hour. Once again I mention the security clearance issue and once again he said "not a problem".

So, I rock up on the Friday at 12:00 (I've worked there before and know that the booking in process can take a while if they're busy) give my name, get a temporary pass and sit and wait. At 12:29, I stand up and walk over to the receptionist just as her phone rings. She answers it, looks at me and says "Are you Mr MojoDog?"

"Yes," I said

"Yes, he is here" she says to the phone, "No, he's got a temporary pass"

At 12:35 a flustered lady rocks up to the visitors centre, introduces herself and says "we were waiting for you in the meeting room, Crapita told us you had security clearance."

At 12:45 I'm in the meeting room faced with the lady + 3 others and the interview begins.

At 13:00 there's a knock at the door, the door opens to reveal a group of people standing outside suited and booted and clearly ready for a meeting. Leader of the group says "We've got this room booked from 13:00"

Lady gets up and says "No, Crapita have booked it for us until 13:30"

Leader of the group adopts a grumpy expression and stalks off.

At 13:05, leader of the group returns with a sheet of paper that shows that Crapita have indeed booked the room for them from 13:00.

Lady who escorted me is scarlet with embarrassment and can only say "But Crapita assured me that we had the room until 13:30"

"Is there anywhere else we can go?" I ask - knowing full well that empty meeting rooms are like rocking horse tulip

"No," she says "I can only apologise, but Crapita assured me that we had the room"

As she escorted me out she aplogised about a hundred times and then said "When did your clearance lapse?"

"Back in March" I said.

"Oh," she said "Crapita told us it was still valid"

I called the agent and began to read his horoscope about the litany of feck-ups - the Richard-Head actually laughed.

He called the next day to tell me I didn't get the gig. "That's a shame," I said "Because it deprives me of the opportunity of telling you and Crapita to shove it up your…"

[MattZani]

Hi all

Change of perspective: I am about to leave my job and since I am in very good terms with the client, I have been asked to help them find my replacement and I'll have to interview some people in the next couple of weeks.

Can you guys suggest any questions to mess around/have fun with my interviewees?

Needless to say I will hire the hot chick (I any applies), I've decided that already.