Originally posted by castoff101
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Is it best to go self employed or umbrella - from a CSA point of view?
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Rhyddid i lofnod psychocandy!!!! -
Originally posted by BrilloPad View PostDo you see the children? If not, why not? Is so, How often do you see them?
As the former committee activist co-ordinator for f4j I have vast amounts of experience of the CSA - but I only give it to those who I am sure are not shirking their responsibilities.
It is my experience that 90% of men do not do the best for their children and approach divorce/seperation in entirely the wrong way. Most men get the kicking they deserve from family courts/CSA/SS etcetc.
It is the children I feel sorry for.
Hes also got two kids from a previous relationship. Mother admitedly is a bit of a nightmare and has done a bunk so he doesnt see them. I found out for him that he can apply to the courts for them to sort something out - £200 it costs or something like that. Can't afford it apparently.
Guy is a welder - earns in excess of £200 a day easily I would imagine. Trouble is a fair percentage of this gets pissed up against the wall....
Cant believe I'm related to him....Rhyddid i lofnod psychocandy!!!!Comment
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Originally posted by Hemingfield View PostThanks again for the responses!
Does anyone know of any 'how to' references to set up a Ltd company for IT contractors?
Brillopad - I am not going into details suffice it to say that I see my eldest as often as is possible (given the distance my cheating ex purposefully moved from me, her often unreasonable and constantly changing conditions for visits and funds permitting). My two youngest live with me. All three children are very well cared for and happy apart from not having me exclusively.
I resent being tarred with sweeping generalisations, especially when it comes to those relating with the CSA and am sorry to hear that your experience has cast a dim view on non-resident Fathers. I've never missed a maintenance payment and have 'shirked' nothing. I would kindly ask you not to imply otherwise in my case. If you wish to advertise your issues with men then please do it elsewhere - not all Mothers wear halos you know.
My intention is to try and improve the financial situation for my Family without (as SockPuppet so addequately put) it all being funnelled into my ex's shoe collection. Nobody loses out.
HemRhyddid i lofnod psychocandy!!!!Comment
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Originally posted by Jessica@WhiteFieldTax View PostAway from day to day work, I'm a unpaid trustee of a Family Mediation Service. Mediation is a court approved - in fact preferred - alternative to court action and, hopefully less expensive - it does depend on both parties being will to sit down and talk.
From this month, legal aid isn't available for family law in courts other than issues like domestic violence, but it is still available for mediation (may not affect the typical member of this forum, but maybe their spouses).
Try and give mediation a go.Rhyddid i lofnod psychocandy!!!!Comment
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Originally posted by psychocandy View PostGood idea the withdrawal of legal aid for family law. I had a mate who got stung with this - his mrs could afford the lot because she didnt have to pay he had to pay himself. So she had unlimited legal resource - he was tied by cost. totally unfair situation.Comment
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We all pay
Not for me to take high moral ground but...
If people dont provide financially for the kids then who picks up the tab?
Tax credits and benefits come from us all through the tax systemComment
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Originally posted by Jessica@WhiteFieldTax View PostAway from day to day work, I'm a unpaid trustee of a Family Mediation Service. Mediation is a court approved - in fact preferred - alternative to court action and, hopefully less expensive - it does depend on both parties being will to sit down and talk.
From this month, legal aid isn't available for family law in courts other than issues like domestic violence, but it is still available for mediation (may not affect the typical member of this forum, but maybe their spouses).
Try and give mediation a go.
Three years later (quite recently) judge in ongoing residence proceedings (we make it to on average one three-day "final hearing" per year) suggested/ordered them to try family therapy instead. £35 for individual meetings, £65 for joint meetings. And you get a 'proper' psychologist/counsellor who will actually tell either party when they're being unhelpful/unreasonable/completely out of line. In our case, he had to kick the ex out and that was the end of this. That didn't make her look good in court thereafter.
After a few years we've won as much as we could have won with regards to residence of his daughters - they're with us most of of the time. But it wasn't easy, just cause he's the father, not the mother, and by that automatically worth less in the eyes of family law - despite having been the main caregiver throughout his girls' lives...
Anyway, if you're thinking about mediation, consider family therapy first/instead.Comment
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Originally posted by LandRover View PostNot for me to take high moral ground but...
If people dont provide financially for the kids then who picks up the tab?
Tax credits and benefits come from us all through the tax system
Also, more importantly, since 2010 child maintenance does not affect the benefits the parent with care gets. Basically, whether the dad pays or not - you/we are still "picking up the tab".Comment
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Originally posted by psychocandy View PostMy own dear brother has got a really sickening attitude. Recently split up from his girlfriend - they have a one-year old girl. Says hes not 'looking after the baby' for her until she does x,y,z. WTF this is his kid!!!!
Hes also got two kids from a previous relationship. Mother admitedly is a bit of a nightmare and has done a bunk so he doesnt see them. I found out for him that he can apply to the courts for them to sort something out - £200 it costs or something like that. Can't afford it apparently.
Guy is a welder - earns in excess of £200 a day easily I would imagine. Trouble is a fair percentage of this gets pissed up against the wall....
Cant believe I'm related to him....
(Apologies for posting three times in a row...should've done a multi-quote...)Comment
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Originally posted by formant View PostMy other half and his ex tried mediation shortly after he left her. £100 per hour for someone to literally just sit there. Mediators don't get involved, which means that if your ex is a completely unreasonable psychopath or anything on that continuum, you might as well burn your money instead.
Three years later (quite recently) judge in ongoing residence proceedings (we make it to on average one three-day "final hearing" per year) suggested/ordered them to try family therapy instead. £35 for individual meetings, £65 for joint meetings. And you get a 'proper' psychologist/counsellor who will actually tell either party when they're being unhelpful/unreasonable/completely out of line. In our case, he had to kick the ex out and that was the end of this. That didn't make her look good in court thereafter.
After a few years we've won as much as we could have won with regards to residence of his daughters - they're with us most of of the time. But it wasn't easy, just cause he's the father, not the mother, and by that automatically worth less in the eyes of family law - despite having been the main caregiver throughout his girls' lives...
Anyway, if you're thinking about mediation, consider family therapy first/instead.Comment
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