Talk like a pirate day - Contractor UK Bulletin Board

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thunderlizard replied

19 September 2007, 22:22
A pirate walks into a pub. He's got a wooden leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch. One of the regulars asks him "How did you lose your leg?"
The pirate says "One stormy night, the wind blew me clean overboard, and it got bitten off by a shark".
Another pub regular asks how he lost his hand.
"I was capturing a merchant ship laden with gold, and it got cut off in the heat of battle".
Then someone asks how he lost his eye. The pirate says "We were fast approaching land, when a seagull dropping landed in it."
"You can't lose an eye just from a seagull dropping" says another of the drinkers.
"Normally, no" says the pirate, "But I hadn't got used to the hook yet".
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Zippy replied

19 September 2007, 17:58
I'll get me cutlass
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Clippy replied

19 September 2007, 16:26
Shiver me timbers - even made the papers: http://tinyurl.com/2eaxgk

Aargh me hearties.
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DBA_bloke replied

19 September 2007, 15:40
Talk like a pirate?

OK: "Who's turn is it in the barrel, me hearties?
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TheFaQQer replied

19 September 2007, 14:56
Originally posted by Moscow Mule View Post

GArrrrrgh, you've got 'im over a barrel there...

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggghhhhhhhhhh - good point.

It's not my turn in the barrel, surely?
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Moscow Mule replied

19 September 2007, 14:40
Originally posted by DBA_bloke View Post

Point of order: Pirates don't pay taxes, because they are, er, pirates. Forfeit.

GArrrrrgh, you've got 'im over a barrel there...
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DBA_bloke replied

19 September 2007, 14:05
Originally posted by TheFaQQer View Post

Where to pirates pay their taxes?

At the H.M.Arrrrrrrrr.Sea

Point of order: Pirates don't pay taxes, because they are, er, pirates. Forfeit.
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TheFaQQer replied

19 September 2007, 11:46
Where to pirates pay their taxes?

At the H.M.Arrrrrrrrr.Sea
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TheFaQQer replied

19 September 2007, 11:44
Did you hear about the pirate with two wooden legs?

They caught fire and burned his ARRrrrse to the ground!
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wobbegong replied

19 September 2007, 11:41
From 'Third rock from the Sun';

Q: "Where are your Buccaneers?"
A: "Underneath my buccan' hat".
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Ivor1 replied

19 September 2007, 11:17
Arrrrr being going for my lunch now me-harties with my crew arrrr
Its going to be 'Pizza's for Eight'
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DaveB replied

19 September 2007, 10:51
Where do Pirates go to take a dump?

The Poop Deck.
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TheFaQQer replied

19 September 2007, 10:47
Where do pirates go to work out?

To the JIM LAD!!!!
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TheFaQQer replied

19 September 2007, 10:45
What do you call a pirate actor who is very popular?

A Superstarrrrrrr!
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DBA_bloke replied

19 September 2007, 10:01
Farkey!
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