Reply to: Wednesday Conundrum

[shaunbhoy]

*!!BUMP!!*


Update. Yesterday, Boy A got a call from the Jeremy Kyle Show asking him if he was prepared to go on there.
Thankfully he declined.

What a mess!!

[vetran]

Correct, it has absolutely no bearing on access, maintenance is for the benefit of the child, as a father who pays more than the CSA minimum I do it because otherwise my son may suffer. Anyone who thinks that they deserve access because they are paying for it needs to think again about their relationship with their child, you can't buy access from the mother.

yes but if you fail to meet your financial responsibilities as a Father then its easy to suggest you are too selfish to be a good Dad, frankly the whole CSA/Maintenance/Divorce set up seems to be very screwed up.

[proggy]

Correct, it has absolutely no bearing on access, maintenance is for the benefit of the child, as a father who pays more than the CSA minimum I do it because otherwise my son may suffer. Anyone who thinks that they deserve access because they are paying for it needs to think again about their relationship with their child, you can't buy access from the mother.

There is no minimum CSA, its just one amount. If you choose to pay more then that's up to you but given its calculated on dividends and salary the amount I pay is a good portion on my income. I also put aside money in an ISA for my kids to give them a decent amount when they are 18.

[MaryPoppins]

Correct, it has absolutely no bearing on access, maintenance is for the benefit of the child, as a father who pays more than the CSA minimum I do it because otherwise my son may suffer. Anyone who thinks that they deserve access because they are paying for it needs to think again about their relationship with their child, you can't buy access from the mother.

So?

[SimonMac]

Good luck to him with getting access to the baby. Could end up costing a fortune and get no-where. Paying maintenance has absolutely no bearing on access.

Correct, it has absolutely no bearing on access, maintenance is for the benefit of the child, as a father who pays more than the CSA minimum I do it because otherwise my son may suffer. Anyone who thinks that they deserve access because they are paying for it needs to think again about their relationship with their child, you can't buy access from the mother.

[shaunbhoy]

Father always told me check out what the Mother in law is like before committing, wise advice.

Indeed. In this case the "Mother-in-law" lost custody of the daughter as her boyfriend was (allegedly) abusing Girl B. That said, she inhabits such a weird fantasy world so much of the time it is impossible to know what to believe. God only knows what the Boy ever saw in her. She is one seriously deranged individual. Silk purses and sow's ears and all that.

I note she isn't besotted enough to clean up the house.

No. In fact if he left a cereal bowl in the sink when he left the house for work at daft o'clock on a monday morning, there was every chance it would still be there upon his return on friday.

[vetran]

She works part-time, and her dad (who is living on benefits with his wife, who has never worked a day in her life!) looks after the sprog for a couple of days during the week. It is not that big a place and ought to be easy to keep relatively tidy with only one toddler to look after.
Mrs SB kept a house twice that size shipshape with 4 sprogs yapping at her ankles.
However, when you factor in umpteen hours worth of Jeremy Kyle each day I expect there just doesn't seem to be enough time!
The tragic fact is that she has been raised in a house where nobody does fook-all and she seems to view that as normal. The boy does not, and after working long hours during the week was fed up coming home to a grotty house that he had to spend his weekends tidying up.
It was only ever going to end one way really.

Father always told me check out what the Mother in law is like before committing, wise advice.

I note she isn't besotted enough to clean up the house.

[shaunbhoy]

Confirms everything we thought about you already.......

Like I give a fook!!

[GB9]

The way the boy ended it all was a sight more sudden than it needed to be, and he could have handled it much more considerately IMHO.
However, as for the rest of your knee-jerk rant, you are well wide of the mark. I suspect that you have been on the receiving end of a nasty dumping and are just projecting your own bitterness into this scenario.
I hope that doing so was cathartic.




Her "ex" has been working away all week as a long distance lorry driver to keep a roof over their heads, and comes home to a house that is permanently in tulip state because the lazy little chav has spent the week watching Jeremy Kyle, getting tattoos, and getting various parts of her body pierced. In between stalking him and anyone else he knows all over Facebook of course.




Thanks for that Judge Judy. Just as a point of interest, are you speaking from experience or just venting hot air from the jilted end of the spectrum?

I have had a few dumpings in my time, a couple less nice than I would have liked. I suppose there is no nice way to do it.

"the lazy little chav has spent the week watching Jeremy Kyle, getting tattoos, and getting various parts of her body pierced. In between stalking him and anyone else he knows all over Facebook of course."

Confirms everything we thought about you already.......

[mudskipper]

Her "ex" has been working away all week as a long distance lorry driver to keep a roof over their heads, and comes home to a house that is permanently in tulip state because the lazy little chav has spent the week watching Jeremy Kyle, getting tattoos, and getting various parts of her body pierced. In between stalking him and anyone else he knows all over Facebook of course.

And there was me being impressed by how impartial you were appearing to be.

[shaunbhoy]

Maybe she is depressed. It sounds like she has been living a fairly tulipty life. I doubt she's enjoyed being relegated to a role of full time cleaner and child carer.

She works part-time, and her dad (who is living on benefits with his wife, who has never worked a day in her life!) looks after the sprog for a couple of days during the week. It is not that big a place and ought to be easy to keep relatively tidy with only one toddler to look after.
Mrs SB kept a house twice that size shipshape with 4 sprogs yapping at her ankles.
However, when you factor in umpteen hours worth of Jeremy Kyle each day I expect there just doesn't seem to be enough time!
The tragic fact is that she has been raised in a house where nobody does fook-all and she seems to view that as normal. The boy does not, and after working long hours during the week was fed up coming home to a grotty house that he had to spend his weekends tidying up.
It was only ever going to end one way really.

[Ticktock]

Could have bought a much cheaper runaround and spent the savings on a cleaner.

But it's so difficult to find a decent cleaner...

[shaunbhoy]

Maybe she is depressed. It sounds like she has been living a fairly tulipty life.

I'd also suggest that buying the BMW was a dumb move from both of them, especially if it's mostly sitting there because he's away all the time. Could have bought a much cheaper runaround and spent the savings on a cleaner.

It was. A move that can be added to a long and fairly uninspiring list sadly.

[doodab]

Maybe she is depressed. It sounds like she has been living a fairly tulipty life. I doubt she's enjoyed being relegated to a role of full time cleaner and child carer.

I'd also suggest that buying the BMW was a dumb move from both of them, especially if it's mostly sitting there because he's away all the time. Could have bought a much cheaper runaround and spent the savings on a cleaner.

[shaunbhoy]

Boy sounds like a bit of a really. Thanks for the car and the baby. Had enough of you now so have it back, and btw, I'm banging someone else.

The way the boy ended it all was a sight more sudden than it needed to be, and he could have handled it much more considerately IMHO.
However, as for the rest of your knee-jerk rant, you are well wide of the mark. I suspect that you have been on the receiving end of a nasty dumping and are just projecting your own bitterness into this scenario.
I hope that doing so was cathartic.

Is she a schizo or just very upset and possibly tulip scared about being a single mum at what sounds like a very young age when her ex has quite clearly been out having more fun himself?

Her "ex" has been working away all week as a long distance lorry driver to keep a roof over their heads, and comes home to a house that is permanently in tulip state because the lazy little chav has spent the week watching Jeremy Kyle, getting tattoos, and getting various parts of her body pierced. In between stalking him and anyone else he knows all over Facebook of course.

Good luck to him with getting access to the baby. Could end up costing a fortune and get no-where. Paying maintenance has absolutely no bearing on access.

Thanks for that Judge Judy. Just as a point of interest, are you speaking from experience or just venting hot air from the jilted end of the spectrum?