Reply to: Do gorillas peel bananas before they eat them?

[EternalOptimist]

The yellowskin Monkeys

forgive me if I told this story before. I think I have
but I want to tell it again, so fck off.

There was this research scientist in the lab in Bootle, and he was researching the psychology of Groupthink.

So he put six monkeys in a big high cage, with no features except a step ladder in the middle, and he didnt feed them for a few days.
When the monkeys were starving, he dangled a nana through the roof of the cage.
One of the monkeys made a dart for the step ladder.
The researcher turned on a hose. He blasted the monkey off the ladder, then he hosed down the others with icy cold water.
The monkeys were wrecked. not only were they starving, but now they were wet and freezing.

Hunger is a powerful driver though. So the bravest monkey headed for the ladder. As soon as he touched it - bamm - an icy jet of water powered him back into the corner.
Then the others got it as well.

It was clear. noone gets the nana, if anyone tries, everyone suffers.

Hunger is a powerful driver though. So the bravest monkey headed for the ladder. As soon as he touched it - bamm - the other five monkeys jumped on him and kicked the living sh!t out of him - 'there is no nana, leave it alone, we will not freeze because of you'

none of those 6 monkeys ever went near that ladder again.

So the researcher removed one of the monkeys and replaced it with another. then stopped the food again.

The new monkey saw the yellowskin nana dangling through the roof, and headed straight for it. as soon as he touched the ladder the ladder, bamm - the other five monkeys jumped on him and kicked the living sh!t out of him

wow. the new monkey (number 7) thought. these guys real dont want me to get that banana.

So the new monkey curled up in the corner and ignored the yellowskin nana.
But this new monkey had never been hosed down. he just didnt like being beaten up.

The researcher now took out one of the original monkeys, and replaced him.

When monkey number 8 went for the nana, he got jumped on and beaten up, with monkey number 7 joining in enthusiastically.

Then the researcher removed the banana completely, and replaced another of the monkeys.

The new monkey ambled around the cage, and inadvertantly touched the step ladder.
The other five jumped on him and beat the crap out of him

After a few more replacements, none of the monkeys in that cage had seen the hose or the yellowskin. But if anyone touched that stepladder - they were dead.

One day, they put a clever contractor monkey in that cage and he asked a simple question.

Why on earth do you guys do it that way???

'er...dunno. but thats the way its always been done around here'

[wim121]

I once had a ginger headed girl - that was great too

Hahahaha fair point!

This does not compute.

Might not seem like it, but it really was a hot hatch. Not much to look at, but she blitzed the road and I could outpace newer modern hatch's and had great torque from the lights. It's speedo ended at 120/130mph and a few times on the motorway I managed to hammer it right to the end stop on the speedo.

However, it did have it's flaws like all cars. Nova's are great mechanically, but very poor electrically and prone to rust on the frame underneath. I never had too much of an issue with electrics, but every year it needed more and more welding. I swear that about 90% of the frames strength was probably from weld seams.

[BrilloPad]

Hahahaha I once had a vauxhall nova and it was a great car.

I once had a ginger headed girl - that was great too

[Pogle]

Pineapples contain a flesh eating enzyme when they are picked straight from the plant.
My Dad told me this, as when he was doing his national service overseas they landed somewhere tropical and in typical army style were told not to pick and eat the pineapple, but not why.
So my Dad being my Dad, did!
And when they went back on the ship was bollocked for not obeying an order. The pineapple had caused a rash on his face, due to this enzyme.
Oh and it was mentioned on QI

[BrilloPad]

i'm allergic to 'nanas

i would vote for any party that would repeal the banana

Bananas can be dangerous for people with poor kidney function. They have alot of potassium - and sudden increases cause death - no other symptoms first.

[Freamon]

The step of actually opening the banana is a bit too fast to see there.

Monkey see monkey do:

[NickFitz]

[wim121]

Hahahaha I once had a vauxhall nova and it was a great car.

[PRC1964]

Fascinating. What do other countries call lemons?

Vauxhalls.

[Freamon]

and did you know

and orange is called an orange because, well, it's orange.

English is the only language in the world where a nana is NOT called a yellow, or a yellow-skin

FACT

Fascinating. What do other countries call lemons?

[EternalOptimist]

and did you know

and orange is called an orange because, well, it's orange.

English is the only language in the world where a nana is NOT called a yellow, or a yellow-skin

FACT

[EternalOptimist]

and why dont they have pips eh?

why dont nanas have pips

[Freamon]

I think they peel them at the opposite end to homosapiens, but the latter switch once the experts are seen in banana peeling action.

Yes. Monkeys pinch the opposite end until it splits, and then peel off from that end. It's actually much better than the traditional way of peeling bananas. I peel all my bananas the monkey way now.

[EternalOptimist]

Took the daughter skydiving last year. I advised her to have no brekkie, just a nana.
Is that because they contain zinc and stuff dad ?

no.it's the only food that tastes the same coming up as it did going down

[TimberWolf]

They squeeze them and the fruit pops out the bottom end, much easier than the human method.

Yeah, and then they eat the skin.