Originally posted by MarillionFan
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Reply to: Cricket Gloat
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Previously on "Cricket Gloat"
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We should probably give up playing the Ashes. There needs to be some kind of competition otherwise it's just a thrashing and no-one likes to see that.
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Cricket Gloat
Australia giving away tickets for last day of the Ashes; result too predictable: innings defeat. I really wish the Aussies would put up some opposition so that England might actually sell some tickets for the next Ashes series. Perhaps England should bowl underarm to give them a chance. Oooh no, underarm bowling's a bit of a touchy subject in the Antipodes.
Anyway, an 'innings defeat' sort of understates the thrashings the Aussies have had; by my reckoning they actually lost the 4th test by TWO inningses, seeing as if they'd batted 3 times they still wouldn't have reached England's total, and it looks like the same story in this test. We will need a whole new category of results to describe these hammerings.
Still, what with all their delusions of adequacy and their weak excuses (the Poms are all foreigners, the Poms have more players, playing against the Poms has brought us donw to their level etc etc), maybe the Aussies could find time to go and practice in the nets before an Ashes series. You know, real practice with real cricket balls bowled by real bowlers instead of a sledging session with some part time pie chuckers.
And let's be honest here; England have gone easy on them this time. No bodyline, no Beefy, no Bob Willis, no, just a bunch of fast-medium line and lengthers and some chaps who can hold a bat up straight.
Please feel free to continue and embellish my cheap, nasty, uncouth, low-blow, rude, arrogant, unnecessary and thoroughly enjoyable gloat.Tags: None
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