"Of course, you will need 7 years of references for the BC level of clearance"

[Platypus]

Here's my list:

Al Coholic
Al Depantsyou
Al Kaseltzer
Al Killeu
Al Knockerup
Al Kykyoras (Greek)
Al Rankin
Alotta Fagina
Ben Debanana
Ben Dover
Bill Loni
Billy McGuire
Bob Wire
Butchie Pantsdown
Clint Torres
Cole Kutz
Connie Lingus
Dick Fitzwell
Dick Yamidda
Dixie Normous
Frank Enstein
Hal Jalykakik
Hank Deshank
Heywood Jablome
Huey Duck
Hugh Douche
Hugh Duct
Hugh G. Wreckshin
Hugh Jass
I. P. Freeley
Ima Dummy
Ivana Tinkle
Izzy Cumming
Jack Offalot
Jacques Strap
Jenna Talia
Jim Nasium
Joe Dildo
Joe Hardern
Joe Mama
Lee Kee Wang
Lou Kout
M'balz Eshari
Mark Miewords
Marty Cone
Mike Hawk
Mike Hunt
Mike Ockhurts
Mike Ocksmall
Mike Rotch
Mike Unstinks
Oliver Kloushoff
Pancho Mouth
Patty O'Furniture
Pepe Roni
Phil Degrave
Phil Lacio
Phil McCrevis
Phil Miaz
Phil Mypockets
Sal Lami
Seymore Butts
Sid Down
Stan DePain
Stan Dup
Stu Peit
Tim Mara
Usuqa M'diq
Willie Doit
Willie Facker
Willie Fagger
Willie Frango
Willy Etter

[TykeMerc]

Michael Souris
Don Canard
Richard Head
Benjamin Dover
Louis Gunn

[conned tractor]

Myra Maynes

(plus phone no of crematorium)

Bingo. Its on the list.

[conned tractor]

Jimmy two fingers
Dave the hat
Mickey Knuckles
Fat Kev
Spongebob Nopants

This one I like, although I don't think I could stop myself from laughing.

She has phoned back to say I'm required to complete an online verification which will be sent out shortly....and didn't ask for the references. Apparantly I need to follow the hyperlink and fill out the online questionairre in order for the application to be processed.

Name and shame.....from what she said - it starts with E, and ends with LAN, although it was called from a witheld number to be fair.

I will report progress as to what is recieved, seems a faff to get some referees. Why not just send out the normal crappy email - is it not working any more.

[swamp]

Myra Maynes

(plus phone no of crematorium)

[Pondlife]

Jimmy two fingers
Dave the hat
Mickey Knuckles
Fat Kev
Spongebob Nopants

[MarillionFan]

Johnie Walker
Ronald Bacardi
Captain Morgan
Bob Fosters
Will Carling

[Zippy]

"I'll call you back in 15 minutes when I find out the rate"

I'm struggling to think up some stupid names and things to ask for in the package.

So far I have James dodger and Chris packet at walkers, any suggestions?

Considering asking for custard creams as part of the package.

Dai Jestive?

[HairyArsedBloke]

any suggestions?

Bill Brewer
Jan Stewer
Peter Gurney
Peter Davy
Daniel Whidoon
Harry Hawk

[conned tractor]

"I'll call you back in 15 minutes when I find out the rate"

I'm struggling to think up some stupid names and things to ask for in the package.

So far I have James dodger and Chris packet at walkers, any suggestions?

Considering asking for custard creams as part of the package.