Originally posted by d000hg
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Reply to: Fick or wot?
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Previously on "Fick or wot?"
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Originally posted by DimPrawn View PostDuring the call the woman said: "It ain't a nice road but you don't expect someone to nick your snowman."
Snow is a good test of how rough your street is:
- Rough: snowman kicked to bits in an hour or less
- Very rough: same but the head is thrown at your house, or the snowman is in your back garden
- Roughish: decapitated or trashed within 24 hours
- OK: people add genitalia
- Good: left well alone
- Excellent: people add decorations or more snowmen next to it
One snowman in our street has a giant icicle stabbed through it's heart, otherwise no fatalities. There is a 7-foot tall snow-penis standing upright in a nearby garden, complete with balls covered in bits of sticks for pubes. Well, it was upright but is slowly leaning/drooping as the sun hits it.
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Originally posted by MaryPoppins View PostThat bit has made me really laugh too.
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Originally posted by DimPrawn View Postbecause she used pound coins for eyes and teaspoons for arms.
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Originally posted by kandr View PostI can empathise, I build a snowman last year and when it thawed the water was absorbed by the ground, it then was soaked up by a orchard a few miles away and the apples where sold by the owner, so he profited from my snowman. I am taking it all the way to Europe.
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I can empathise, I build a snowman last year and when it thawed the water was absorbed by the ground, it then was soaked up by a orchard a few miles away and the apples where sold by the owner, so he profited from my snowman. I am taking it all the way to Europe.
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I left a £50 note on the path outside my house and some **** nicked it after a few hours.
Police didn't seem interested in the crime.
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Originally posted by TimberWolf View PostWouldn't pennies do for the eyes? Or even buttons?
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I tested the Dutch emergency services call centre; about 75% of the calls were fake callers;
- calling to hurl abuse at the telephonists
- children pissing around
- people asking where they can order a pizza
- heavy breather types wanting a female voice on the line
- trouser pocket calls, where the number was accidentally dialled on the mobile
We introduced some software to help the coppers catch the idiots.
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If you have ever been to Chatham and seen the in-bred spongers living there, you would not feel so surprised.
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Wouldn't pennies do for the eyes? Or even buttons? Did she also lose a carrot and some walnuts?
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