Reply to: Have any of you......

[original PM]

you guys have met some firkin weirdos

mostly we just have people who sit around doing feck all all day and complaining about it.

[Amiga500]

In my last contract I sat next to a guy who played Flight Sim with a bowl of pasta in his lap, another guy who would have a wink into the curtains and yet another whos shoes always smelt of piss!

Yeah, happy days, I'm still eating the bowls of pasta but no more flight sim for now.

However, on my new contract, I am using voice recognition to dictate my project reports, although I sit next to some bigoted yob, who sits there in his England top giving me the evils whenever I dictate into my computer.

[foritisme]

I have him next to me and a guy who constantly grunts all day. he sounds like somebody dragging a table. MP3 player time I think.

You're not in Cardiff by any chance ??


Nah you can't be talking about the same bloke.

[hyperD]

I sat down next to a guy whose parents had inadvertently forgotten to teach him how most humans eat. For some reason, eating to him had turned into the “who can shove the most cream eggs, gummy bears and crisps into his mouth in under a minute” competition.

Also, the salient point about chewing had flown him by and in his micro-Darwinistic world, inhaling his food became the dominant evolutionary trait.

It was like sitting next to a ******* Dyson sucking up vomit.

[suityou01]

poor sod.

I once got into a taxi in Scunthorpe being driven by a woman with no arms.
she had one foot on the pedals and one foot on the steering wheel

actually that was me, in a cunning disguise.

HTH

[stek]

We had a guy with OCD, kept cleaning his coffee cup and his hands were red raw with constant scrubbing. He'd write little notes to himself saying 'My cup is DEFINATELY clean, I've checked, I must not check again'

We tried to send him over the edge by hiding his cup but it didn't really work, or maybe it did, he left and claimed constructive dismissal!

Where's my cup gone?

[Addanc]

sat next to somebody who constanty talks to himself and his computer



Jesus it isn't going to talk back ffs

My computer is sentient, if I don't engage it in dialogue it gets very uncooperative. I thought all computers were sentient.

[BoredBloke]

I sat next to a guy who had no arms or legs, he didnt get much done.

How did you get a job as a sandbag? I presume that was his profession.

At boots they had a guy like that who had a drum stick with a rubber thing stuck to the end in his mouth and that's how he typed. He was quite quick but must have gone home with a sore neck after a lot of typing. Poor sod couldn't even rub it better!

[Diestl]

In my last contract I sat next to a guy who played Flight Sim with a bowl of pasta in his lap, another guy who would have a wank into the curtains and yet another whos shoes always smelt of piss!

[singhr]

I have a whistler, a hummer and an indian girl who appears to be chanting in a low voice - all flippin day. We also have a cackling witch who comes in the office once a day - what a merry band we are.

[conned tractor]

On the last contract was seated in an office with a chap who'd suddenly jump up shouting and swearing at his computer physically waving his arms around or banging the desk or throw some papers about. To the point that I thought he was about to pick up the computer and throw it out the window - first floor office. Very scary at first, thought he was a sarnie short of picnic, but eventually became a bit of a joke with the other blokes there.

[Diestl]

I have sat next to quite a few guys with a full complement of arms and legs and still didn't get much done.

Oddly enough most of em were busy posting on some contractor forum or summat

[BoltonLad]

I have sat next to quite a few guys with a full complement of arms and legs and still didn't get much done.

Oddly enough most of em were busy posting on some contractor forum or summat

Well said.

[northernladuk]

I have sat next to quite a few guys with a full complement of arms and legs and still didn't get much done.

Oddly enough most of em were busy posting on some contractor forum or summat

[Diestl]

I sat next to a guy who had no arms or legs, he didnt get much done.