Reply to: My Dad is bigger than your Dad

[jmo21]

Yep me too. And I'm Kate Moss's younger and more attractive lesbian sister.

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thanks!

[rsingh]

Can anyone beat this?

I'll start:

I was the youngest person in the UK to pass a cycling proficiency test, I did this despite having no arms or legs

Clever dick...

[nomadd]

Can anyone beat this?

Yes. I'm English. That beats all that Scottish rubbish that he posted hands-down.

Nomadd

[HairyArsedBloke]

My father in one of his many drunken states bought several lots of land on the moon from that guy who laid claim to the moon from the UN. Upon his death he bequeathed them to me. I have studied these locations and have found that both the US and Russians have landed probes on some of these sites. I requested that the governments of the countries that own these probes remove them from my land or pay compensatory rent.

I now receive an annual stipend from both countries for the use of my lunar estates until they remove their structures.

Which is nice.

[Churchill]

5 or 4 string?

What? His bollocks? Not got a clue mate.

[Cliphead]

Yeah but you're not as good as my Uncle Barry the banjo playing bollockist from Brighouse!

5 or 4 string?

[Churchill]

With my teeth (without taking them out).

Yeah but you're not as good as my Uncle Barry the banjo playing bollockist from Brighouse!

[Bagpuss]

Gilbert and George offered me £300k for one of my turds, I turned them down because I thought they were taking the p1ss.

[Cliphead]

With your bollocks?

Thought not!

With my teeth (without taking them out).

[Zippy]

Up for a duel?

Yeah. But you have to bring the handbags

[Churchill]

I can play a banjo

With your bollocks?

Thought not!

[Diver]

I play an organ for people on the internet.


No, hang on, that's not right...

It is.

I've seen your website

[Cliphead]

Yep me too. And I'm Kate Moss's younger and more attractive lesbian sister.

Up for a duel?

[Evil Hangover]

I can use a knife and fork (simultaneously), to cut up and consume basic foodstuffs.

[Pondlife]

I play an organ for people on the internet.


No, hang on, that's not right...