Reply to: Smacked a la Gob

[EternalOptimist]

what are you laughing at you festering tit.

you'd laugh if your @rse caught fire

[Cyberman]

If you are spending so much time in the pub that the owners think you ought to be doing your fair share of the housework, maybe it is time to have a look at your life.

[cojak]

The manageress of the local pub asked me if I had a strimmer - er yes I do.
Is there any chance you could do the garden at the back ? - er no.

its about 16 million acres - cheeky wench

You mean you didn't put in a quote???

You're slipping EO!

[RichardCranium]

Sure. I've just plugged it in. Get ready to catch the coils when I lob it out of the window.

I once spent a happy 20 minutes watching the numpties across the road standing in their front garden trying to get an extension lead up to a bedroom window. They threw it, they attached the plug to things and threw it, they tied a line to the plug and threw the line. They got a chair from the house and tried standing on that; it didn't help. They swapped thrower & catcher; that didn't help.

In the end they gave up and went round to their neighbour. Two minutes later the extension lead was coming out of the neighbour's downstairs window.

There ain't no limit to human ingenuity.

[EternalOptimist]

Oh, so Goosing the landlady is still ok then?

It's practically mandatory

[Churchill]

no, we dont play cricket oop here

Oh, so Goosing the landlady is still ok then?

[EternalOptimist]

What are you afraid of? Geese or goosing the landlady of the pub?

no, we dont play cricket oop here

[Churchill]

cant do that, I'm afraid

What are you afraid of? Geese or goosing the landlady of the pub?

[EternalOptimist]

When I was growing up in India we had a lot of geese in the garden They are by far the best way of keeping the lawn short. You just have to be careful not to slip on their droppings when you are playing cricket. You could suggest this to your lady in the pub.

cant do that, I'm afraid

[chetty]

When I was growing up in India we had a lot of geese in the garden They are by far the best way of keeping the lawn short. You just have to be careful not to slip on their droppings when you are playing cricket. You could suggest this to your lady in the pub.

[thunderlizard]

Sure. I've just plugged it in. Get ready to catch the coils when I lob it out of the window.

[EternalOptimist]

If you are spending so much time in the pub that the owners think you ought to be doing your fair share of the housework, maybe it is time to have a look at your life.

After taking your advice, I have decided to nip around tonight with the strimmer.
Can you lend me an extension cable ?

[thunderlizard]

If you are spending so much time in the pub that the owners think you ought to be doing your fair share of the housework, maybe it is time to have a look at your life.

[EternalOptimist]

Hairy lass, then?

a right two-spooner

[sasguru]

Hairy lass, then?