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Previously on "They've just locked the stationary cupboard"

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  • Archangel
    replied
    They charge for pens at my current client!


    (Mind you I am working for Parker )

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by minestrone View Post
    If the person who ran that cupboard was in charge of investments, they might still have a bank.
    I think you might have got to the root of the problem here. Many huge corporations employ large numbers of conscientious people who try to do their work to the best of their ability; unfortunately none of those people are given responsibility for anything important; that’s left to the cowboys and fly-by-nights who speak managementese.

    Leave a comment:


  • minestrone
    replied
    Last time I was with BoS I had to wait for the stationary cupboard to open ( it had opening times ) then head down, show my card and sign a receipt to get a one Biro pen.

    If the person who ran that cupboard was in charge of investments, they might still have a bank.

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by AZZIK View Post
    Forget locking it, they've relocated it here! We used to have a little cupboard on every floor, but I have to go the 2nd floor if I want a bloody pen now!

    Always a money-saver; pay people to walk around the building all day.

    Leave a comment:


  • threaded
    replied
    Originally posted by swamp View Post
    Every time things are about to go bad at a client site it always starts with them locking the stationary cupboard. It's a sign. It means the budget is so screwed they can't even trust people not to exceed their Biro quota.

    Well they've just locked the cupboard here, and it wasn't exactly a treasure trove with anything worth pilfering. They buy only the cheapest no-name paper and pens, which usually don't work.
    Must say, now you mention it, yes, that is a pattern I've noticed. One of the clients put up a book for you to fill in whenever you took anything from the stationary cupboard, about a month before they started laying people off.

    Leave a comment:


  • AZZIK
    replied
    Originally posted by swamp View Post
    Every time things are about to go bad at a client site it always starts with them locking the stationary cupboard. It's a sign. It means the budget is so screwed they can't even trust people not to exceed their Biro quota.

    Well they've just locked the cupboard here, and it wasn't exactly a treasure trove with anything worth pilfering. They buy only the cheapest no-name paper and pens, which usually don't work.
    Forget locking it, they've relocated it here! We used to have a little cupboard on every floor, but I have to go the 2nd floor if I want a bloody pen now!

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by moorfield View Post
    Another sign for sure. Spending what's left of their budget on corporate sounding jollies while they can.
    Now then, what would happen if one of us, many of whom are Ltd directors, were to blow company funds on a 5* jolly whle knowing that our Ltd is in financial problems? If your Ltd ends up bankrupt and the receivers found out about this, you’d be taken to the cleaners; the same should happen in the case of corporate ‘directors’ who do this.

    Leave a comment:


  • moorfield
    replied
    Originally posted by thelace View Post
    At my last co. the directors went away on a 2 day strategy conference at a swish hotel and spa to devise a strategy to reduce costs

    Managers.... flipless tulipters more like
    Another sign for sure. Spending what's left of their budget on corporate sounding jollies while they can.

    Leave a comment:


  • minestrone
    replied
    Spent the whole of last week emptying the stationary cupboard, have enough bulldog clips and staples for one hell of a S&M party.

    Leave a comment:


  • expat
    replied
    Originally posted by gingerjedi View Post
    We all must have had the awkward situation where the permy boss can no longer look you in the eye and the other permies stop talking when you enter the room.
    Oh please. You want to be out of that.

    Leave a comment:


  • thelace
    replied
    At my last co. the directors went away on a 2 day strategy conference at a swish hotel and spa to devise a strategy to reduce costs

    If that wasn't bad enough in itself, the strategy they came back with was to;

    a) reduce overtime (we weren't working overtime - d'oh we weren't selling anything, why would there need to be overtime).

    b) restrict the use of cleaning rags

    We worked out that if we didn't use any cleaning rags at all, it would take until 2050 to save their bill for the hotel

    Managers.... Feckless tulipters more like

    Leave a comment:


  • gingerjedi
    replied
    We all must have had the awkward situation where the permy boss can no longer look you in the eye and the other permies stop talking when you enter the room.

    Leave a comment:


  • suityou01
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    Yep, around here you’re allowed one paper serviette in the canteen, and must provide a reason for having two. I expect the soft bog roll will shortly be replaced with that nasty tracing paper that just spreads everything around instead of absorbing one’s shytte.

    Always a laugh to see large companies attempting to save money. The radical idea of scrapping a few layers of management would never take off, but denying people a bic biro or a paper serviette; that’s the way to go.
    Tracing paper toilet paper now replaced with old newspaper on string. Up side is its more absorbent and you can wipe yer a*se on articles about the credit crunch.

    Leave a comment:


  • DimPrawn
    replied
    Next step after locking the stationary cupboard is not replacing dead strip lights and blocking outgoing calls from your desk.

    Leave a comment:


  • techno
    replied
    Originally posted by Sysman View Post
    One pretty reliable indicator of imminent doom is HR numbers increasing. If HR is located in a different building or city, keep an eye on organisation charts and phonebooks to monitor their numbers


    on the bulliten board here at clientco they have put up a notice for 2 new positions in the HR department (there are only 3 there at the mo)

    doomed!!!!!!!!!!

    Leave a comment:

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