Reply to: I don’t really give a tulip any more

[Sysman]

I think TheDailyWTF had something like that. The coders and testers worked as a team whereby the coder would fix a bug but leave some small aspect unresolved to be re-raised, or the coder would introduce tiny unimportant bugs so the tester could catch them.

That reminds me of the lass who was once testing an app that I was developing. She was extremely devious with the tests she devised, and I entered into the spirit of the competition by refusing to be beat. The end result was probably the most rock solid app that company had ever produced. Job satisfaction indeed

[Spacecadet]

You evil bastard.

keeps people on their toes

actually a "bonus fund" could be established.
testers are paid out of the fund for every bug found
anything left is paid to the developers

[Mich the Tester]

What they should have done is taken the bonus out of the programmers pay

You evil bastard.

[d000hg]

There was something I was reading the other day about the MVC pattern and thought how very true.

When was the last time you saw the MVC pattern implemented correctly? (That you didn't code up yourself, that is)

Isn't that why things like Apache and Spring exist? Or do lots of projects forbid using 'evil open source'
code?

[Spacecadet]

I once worked at a place which had the amazingly stupid policy of paying testers a bonus for every bug found.

What they should have done is taken the bonus out of the programmers pay

[d000hg]

I once worked at a place which had the amazingly stupid policy of paying testers a bonus for every bug found. Of course, one bug can very quickly be made into five if you find other screens or routines that access the same piece of code, and some people actually avoided reporting bugs in early test phases in the knowledge that they would grow out to much more bugs later on.

Eventually, having paid out some mid-range saloon car sized bonuses and seeing the stuff in the car park, the CIO decided to appoint a manager who knew something about testing. Party over.

I think TheDailyWTF had something like that. The coders and testers worked as a team whereby the coder would fix a bug but leave some small aspect unresolved to be re-raised, or the coder would introduce tiny unimportant bugs so the tester could catch them.

[Mich the Tester]

one problem I consistently have as a tester is that I have to be constantly raiseing defects to prove that I am working. So to keep the numpties happy all defects no matter how minor are logged so that there is an audit trail. Would be quicker and easier to just have a quick chat with the dev to get most fixed but I have to appear to be doing lots to earn my money hence lots of bugs raised no matter what priority they are....

I once worked at a place which had the amazingly stupid policy of paying testers a bonus for every bug found. Of course, one bug can very quickly be made into five if you find other screens or routines that access the same piece of code, and some people actually avoided reporting bugs in early test phases in the knowledge that they would grow out to much more bugs later on.

Eventually, having paid out some mid-range saloon car sized bonuses and seeing the stuff in the car park, the CIO decided to appoint a manager who knew something about testing. Party over.

[Ardesco]

Finished my one liner, well it turned out to be 2 lines.

I did a JSP page the other day, and just been told I missed a full stop, I changed it in front of the BA and checked it in, they are raising a defect just now on test director, the mail should be hitting my inbox any minute.



Anyway, that is me till Tuesday, pub lunch in 2 hours.

one problem I consistently have as a tester is that I have to be constantly raiseing defects to prove that I am working. So to keep the numpties happy all defects no matter how minor are logged so that there is an audit trail. Would be quicker and easier to just have a quick chat with the dev to get most fixed but I have to appear to be doing lots to earn my money hence lots of bugs raised no matter what priority they are....

[Purple Dalek]

I have a one liner todo today.

With all the associated crap that goes with it I should be finished it at 10:00, I will ask for more work where I will be told "The planning meeting is on Tuesday, you will have to wait till then"

Clearcase admin: head stream, rebase started

[Mich the Tester]

changed it in front of the BA and checked it in, they are raising a defect just now on test director, the mail should be hitting my inbox any minute.

That'll give you an excuse to delay do ing anything about it for a bit longer. Ask them to show you which acceptance criteria is affected by the full stop before you repair it. Tell them you need reference to teh applicable paragraph in the functional design. You'll be complying with 'best practises' and it'll give you plenty of time for a good pub lunch.

[minestrone]

Finished my one liner, well it turned out to be 2 lines.

I did a JSP page the other day, and just been told I missed a full stop, I changed it in front of the BA and checked it in, they are raising a defect just now on test director, the mail should be hitting my inbox any minute.



Anyway, that is me till Tuesday, pub lunch in 2 hours.

[minestrone]

I have a one liner todo today.

With all the associated crap that goes with it I should be finished it at 10:00, I will ask for more work where I will be told "The planning meeting is on Tuesday, you will have to wait till then"

[Badger]

Bored out my tits.

Tits would never ever bore me

I would like to congratulate Mich on starting an excellent post, I think the majority of us share his views.

Same tulip different client.

[BrilloPad]

I have to be honest I could probably do my weeks work in about 4 hours and that is not my fault, the team I am in just create that environment.

"can I have a DB password to finish this stored proc?"

"you will have to wait a few days for that"

"OK, do you have anything for me to do?"

"can you wait for the planning meeting tomorrow"

Bored out my tits.

At clientco I assign 2 days for a 1 line change cos of all the stupid red tape. And they have armies of "SOX" w**kers chasing this stuff up

[Purple Dalek]

There was something I was reading the other day about the MVC pattern and thought how very true.

When was the last time you saw the MVC pattern implemented correctly? (That you didn't code up yourself, that is)

And it got me to thinking.

When was the last time you saw a thread safe singleton pattern? And there's more...

Is it me, or does anyone else seem to go from contract to contract fixing and rewriting utter crap some monkeys have written between games of bulltulip bingo?

Then when you're just about to get onto some interesting stuff, another monkey comes along and ****s it all back up again? Usually in the "oh we don't want to use XYZ because we're going to rationalise on only one tool." That one tool being only able to do the task required if you essentially rewrite it or buy some hideously expensive library. Then you go back to that client 5 years later and find they're stuck with a now unsupported version of the tool/library, you pull the old abandoned one from a CD and it performs more reliably and with less resource utilisation and the bosses think you're a god damned genius...

You find you just don't care to argue with them. Let 'em get on with it. As long as my time-sheet gets signed, I just fail to care any longer. Which is the attitude the project managers appear to prefer.