Reply to: Working with Germans

[Bob Dalek]

I once worked with a couple of Germans when they were hired to deploy a new web site for the company I worked for.

They were the rudest pair I have come across and the project did not go well.

At one point the rudest of the two started banging his fists on the table and shouted..

'Ve must have 400megabits of bandvidth.' but all I could offer was a soggy 10mb half duplex connection. He wasn't impressed.

Anyway, on his last day, he caught me doing the John Cleese silly walk (thought he wasn't looking) and we never saw him again.

Looking back, maybe I was ruder than them.

Ah! You see, to a German, a joke is no laughing matter.

[bellymonster]

I once worked with a couple of Germans when they were hired to deploy a new web site for the company I worked for.

They were the rudest pair I have come across and the project did not go well.

At one point the rudest of the two started banging his fists on the table and shouted..

'Ve must have 400megabits of bandvidth.' but all I could offer was a soggy 10mb half duplex connection. He wasn't impressed.

Anyway, on his last day, he caught me doing the John Cleese silly walk (thought he wasn't looking) and we never saw him again.

Looking back, maybe I was ruder than them.

[sunnysan]

English

I see what you did there

Schoolboy error

[oracleslave]

"Mistakes where made" : its a total fckup

I see what you did there

[sunnysan]

English

A lot of things in English are interpreted in context whereas this is apparently not the case in many other languages.

A few I can think of Saying: Meaning

"This really should have been completed by now" : WTF isnt it done?
"He needs training" : He is fcking useless
"Mistakes where made" : its a total fckup
"I need to discuss the options with you" : You will sit down,STFU and do what I say.
"You appear to have resource issues" :You and your team are lazy cnuts.
"Referring to the company org chart.." : You are my b1tch
"Communication appears to be an issue" : WTF didnt you listen?

[EternalOptimist]

Anyone know any German jokes?

Zis German, sorry
this German walks into the project office, und says
sorry
and says

'I vud like to introduce Oeg'
'He ist mein Alter ego'


I just made that one up
IGMC

[IR35 Avoider]

There was a discussion because I did use the term "should" as many english would, with the meaning that there should be 99.99% percent probability it will work. Of course, this can never be accepted by any germanic person who only understand 100% or 0%.

I seem to remember reading somewhere that an instruction manual in India had to be rewritten, because when it said that in certain circumstances somebody "should" do something, they took that to mean that it was optional. In fact I suspect most non-British english speakers would interpret it that way. Why didn't the writer say "must" if that's what he/she meant?

[tay]

Knock knock
Who is there?
The Gestappo

[TimberWolf]

Anyone know any German jokes?

[tay]

I know one who wanted to finish the project as quickly as possible before opposition could be readied. One person did put up a very large barrier, but we just went around it. One pesky little bugger did resist for a long time mainly as he wasnt part fo the company proper, we got bored trying to get to him, so we backstabbed another project, but it turned out they had a bigger budget and ended up eating up our project. Our manager resigned and we got broken up into pieces for other project teams to run.

[Diestl]

I always find it disturbing when German colleagues use the phrase 'final solution'.

One even said he was 'only following orders' the other day...

I had one German project manager who gave us all coloured stars to wear, depending on our race etc!!!

[Moscow Mule]

I always find it disturbing when German colleagues use the phrase 'final solution'.

One even said he was 'only following orders' the other day...

I think your German colleagues may have discovered irony. I know, highly unlikely, but definitely possible....

[Toastiness]

I always find it disturbing when German colleagues use the phrase 'final solution'.

One even said he was 'only following orders' the other day...

[Francko]

Funny I was chatting to a german last night , who was dissing English, saying they are all vague and frustrating to work with owing to there seeming inability to communicate anything without an over reliance on innuendo.

Russians dont really get it either.

Just an opinion but I think that the English are the regional odd ones out with regards to work and communication styles.

There was a discussion because I did use the term "should" as many english would, with the meaning that there should be 99.99% percent probability it will work. Of course, this can never be accepted by any germanic person who only understand 100% or 0%.

[sunnysan]

Vantage Point

Funny I was chatting to a german last night , who was dissing English, saying they are all vague and frustrating to work with owing to there seeming inability to communicate anything without an over reliance on innuendo.

Russians dont really get it either.

Just an opinion but I think that the English are the regional odd ones out with regards to work and communication styles.