Reply to: Wasps

[chicane]

To those claiming wasps don't have a purpose - I disagree. They make excellent target practice in conjunction with a DIY flamethrower made using a bottle of Lynx and a lighter.

[Apache]

Try bees instead

Try swapping them for bees - they have a much more pleasant disposition and they actually serve a valid purpose - they provide honey, they provide propolis (might not be spelt right), they polllenate (definitely not spelt right) and they keep old beekeepers out of trouble. What the hell do wasps do? They're nothing but delinquent trouble making hoodies of the insect world - if there was an insect ASBO they'd be collecting them and laughing about it. Lets just be thankful they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd be torching sheds and steeling more than picnics - little bastards.

[barely_pointless]

Anyone got any good tips in regard to wasps?

Be Careful with the female ones in a black dress on a friday night, you should be relaxed, confident and gently let slip that you work in "Finance", if pressed you should mention IB, but disregard any continued conversation about you as that would appear vulgar, talk about her, as she is what matters, a few kaprioskia's or similar cocktails later, ask the bar tender to provide you with his choice , and before you know it you'll be buried in daddies little ........... and being invited to barbies in Henley ?

avoid the male ones.......

[Colemanisor]

All life is sacred rhubarb notwithstanding, aren't they the most pointless insect?

Bees create lovely honey, only sting when threatened, and die if they do. Harsh.

Wasps on the other hand, sting multiple times with no consequences, and don't do anything except ruin your time outside.

Slaughter them indiscriminately, I say.

Amen to that Brother - death to the Wasp - death, death, death

[richard-af]

Wasps are Traffic Warden embryos.

[Chugnut]

You are all bastards who will rot in hell for being so nasty to little waspies.

All life is sacred rhubarb notwithstanding, aren't they the most pointless insect?

Bees create lovely honey, only sting when threatened, and die if they do. Harsh.

Wasps on the other hand, sting multiple times with no consequences, and don't do anything except ruin your time outside.

Slaughter them indiscriminately, I say.

[Colemanisor]

Trust me, just shoot the nest with an air rifle from close range. That way you get to see al l the lovely wee waspies!!! Then you can hit it with the bat or catch them with chopsticks!!

Or if you manage to track down one of those 190,000 AK47's the US have "lost", that could cause some major wasp-carnage!

[xoggoth]

You are all bastards who will rot in hell for being so nasty to little waspies.

[daviejones]

Trust me, just shoot the nest with an air rifle from close range. That way you get to see al l the lovely wee waspies!!! Then you can hit it with the bat or catch them with chopsticks!!

[Colemanisor]

Interesting 6 foot diameter burnt patch in the middle of the lawn.

Nah, most of the petrol went down the hole - turned it into Wasp Hell, mmwuhahahahahaha!

[King Cnvt]

Last year I came across a ground-based nest after mowing over it, little buggers stung me a bit! Got my own back though, 1/2 gal unleaded and a match, stand well back - woof, no more wasps. Now whose laughing, not those feckin wasps.

Interesting 6 foot diameter burnt patch in the middle of the lawn.

[Colemanisor]

Last year I came across a ground-based nest after mowing over it, little buggers stung me a bit! Got my own back though, 1/2 gal unleaded and a match, stand well back - woof, no more wasps. Now whose laughing, not those feckin wasps.

[richard-af]

Blow into a paper bag and tie it above your picnic.
(Apparently the little feckers think it is a rival nest and stay away.)

Hanging a wasps' nest over your picnic prevents brown paper bags blowing onto your sandwiches.

[BoredBloke]

We had a nest in our garden - the council came and sorted it out. Didn't cost us anything.

[Lucy]

Blow into a paper bag and tie it above your picnic.
(Apparently the little feckers think it is a rival nest and stay away.)