Reply to: Which law did you last break?

[Moscow Mule]

Stole a network cable from work last night - f'n hotel had run out again.

I might bring it back though so I'm not rotten to the core like you paperclip theives.

[wobbegong]

You will be asking how long I have spent in prison next.

My (then) six year old son asked my wife in the middle of a crowded supermarket, "Mum, how many times have you been to prison?". You could've heard a pin drop.

[el duder]

How long did you spend in prison, LG?

Is watching online porn illegal?

[Kyajae]

You will be asking how long I have spent in prison next.

How long did you spend in prison, LG?

[The Lone Gunman]

You will be asking how long I have spent in prison next.

[Sockpuppet]

This is a very tame thread - how about a "When were you last arrested?" thread.

Never. Honest Guv.

[BrilloPad]

This is a very tame thread - how about a "When were you last arrested?" thread.

[The Lone Gunman]

I knew about the smoking ban but I didn't know about the w*nking bit. Sh!t.

I used to wank and smoke, but the smell of burning pubes got too much. Not a problem our Sal will have apparently, unless she is wanking her lad of course (assuming he is not also bald, is he?).

[Masher]

Adultery isn't against the law is it?!

I'm getting ready to break the law like the wind next week

<stupid fecking god-bothers and their w*nking smoking ban>

I knew about the smoking ban but I didn't know about the w*nking bit. Sh!t.

[Kyajae]

I'm surprised you're not already on the sex offenders register.

I'm being prosecuted under the Wildlife Act for killing the tree.

[PRC1964]

I took a piss behind a tree whilst out walking the dogs last week. Do I qualify as a dangerous crooked desparado?

I'm surprised you're not already on the sex offenders register.

[snaw]

I took a piss behind a tree whilst out walking the dogs last week. Do I qualify as a dangerous crooked desparado?

Depends on whether or not you got down on your hands and knees, sniffed the tree and cocked a leg before you took the piss.

[Kyajae]

I took a piss behind a tree whilst out walking the dogs last week. Do I qualify as a dangerous crooked desparado?

[lilelvis2000]

Too many things to mention...
- scammed the insurance company
- driving while I really shouldn't be
- exceeding the speed limit several times a day
- cooking the books
about a dozen other things.

[Zippy]

Claiming a receipt for £2.97 was for a business-related expense. Up yours Hector!