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Previously on "My next car will be a Nissan Qashqai"

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  • jamesbrown
    replied
    Originally posted by darmstadt View Post
    did the bird who was giving you a blowjob at the time bite your cock off?
    Reminds me of that old "classic", the Lair of the White Worm, which is **distinctly NSFW** (mainly because it's utter ******** ).

    Leave a comment:


  • Mordac
    replied
    Originally posted by darmstadt View Post
    did the bird who was giving you a blowjob at the time bite your cock off?
    Don't laugh, that did happen apparently, it was in the 80's though. Stiffer suspension in those days, it seems...

    Leave a comment:


  • darmstadt
    replied
    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
    Scotch and the baccy! I was rolling a spliff with my elbows on the wheel.

    and the mobile phone crooked to my ear went flying!

    Blasted speed bumps!
    did the bird who was giving you a blowjob at the time bite your cock off?

    Leave a comment:


  • MrMarkyMark
    replied
    FTFY

    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
    Scotch and the baccy! I was rolling a spliff with my elbows on the wheel.

    and the mobile phone crooked to my ear went flying, along with the big bag of primo cocaine I was sniffing from!

    Blasted speed bumps!

    Leave a comment:


  • OwlHoot
    replied
    Originally posted by MrMarkyMark View Post
    I hope he didn't spill his bottle of Scotch
    Scotch and the baccy! I was rolling a spliff with my elbows on the wheel.

    and the mobile phone crooked to my ear went flying!

    Blasted speed bumps!

    Leave a comment:


  • MrMarkyMark
    replied
    Originally posted by meridian View Post
    50 mph in a residential area, through Give Way markings and a roundabout, on a dark rainy night, and you think you're lucky not to damage your suspension? Lucky not to kill someone, more like.

    Go to the nearest Post Office and hand your licence back, you're not fit to be behind the wheel of any vehicle.
    I hope he didn't spill his bottle of Scotch

    Leave a comment:


  • meridian
    replied
    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
    Been there done that, bombing over this fecking thing in a side street in Ladbroke Grove a few years ago, at 50 MPH one dark rainy night so I didn't see it!:

    giant circular bump in middle of road

    Actually, I'm pretty sure it was much higher back then. I was damned lucky not to completely knacker my suspension!

    It's easily done, and I didn't even have the excuse of a bawling infant in the back of the car!
    50 mph in a residential area, through Give Way markings and a roundabout, on a dark rainy night, and you think you're lucky not to damage your suspension? Lucky not to kill someone, more like.

    Go to the nearest Post Office and hand your licence back, you're not fit to be behind the wheel of any vehicle.

    Leave a comment:


  • Halo Jones
    replied
    Originally posted by SueEllen View Post
    Those sort of cars are useful if you have a large pet or three to ferry around, which is why people get them.
    Or wheel chairs, there are not many cars that can take a wheel chair in the boot (even folded up), also the ground clearance is handy when parking on building sites.

    I would rather a sporty 2 seater but practicality has to happen

    Leave a comment:


  • barrydidit
    replied
    Originally posted by SueEllen View Post
    Those sort of cars are useful if you have a large pet murdered prostitute or three to ferry around to Owlhoot's well, which is why people get them.
    FTFY

    Leave a comment:


  • SueEllen
    replied
    Originally posted by ladymuck View Post
    I was given a Qashqai once as a courtesy car while my 350z was in for service. Comfy enough. Wouldn't buy one though; not my sort of car. It's got room in the back where people can sit down and a boot that still has plenty of space after you've put a couple of Fortnum's carrier bag in it. Madness.
    Those sort of cars are useful if you have a large pet or three to ferry around, which is why people get them.

    Leave a comment:


  • ladymuck
    replied
    I was given a Qashqai once as a courtesy car while my 350z was in for service. Comfy enough. Wouldn't buy one though; not my sort of car. It's got room in the back where people can sit down and a boot that still has plenty of space after you've put a couple of Fortnum's carrier bag in it. Madness.

    Leave a comment:


  • malvolio
    replied
    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
    Been there done that, bombing over this fecking thing in a side street in Ladbroke Grove a few years ago, at 50 MPH one dark rainy night so I didn't see it!:

    giant circular bump in middle of road

    Actually, I'm pretty sure it was much higher back then. I was damned lucky not to completely knacker my suspension!

    It's easily done, and I didn't even have the excuse of a bawling infant in the back of the car!
    Look at the pictures and read the testimony. She was the wrong side of a solid white line, the truck driver braked to let her through but knew she couldn't make the turn and she hit a full blown frickin' roundabout, not a speed bump.

    Also Ladbroke Grove is in a 30 limit (street lights and no repeater signs for anything else) and you obviously missed the crossroads and the warning signs. So please don't try and lecture people on bad driving...

    Leave a comment:


  • LondonManc
    replied
    Originally posted by d000hg View Post
    It's called the law innit? You have more visibility, more control and are the one who will be injuring the cyclist/pedestrian so the onus is on you to be aware of dangerous cyclists. In reality if a cyclist does something stupid and you run them over, how are you going to feel? Will you be fine because it wasn't your fault, or will you be traumatised because regardless of fault, you squished a person under your wheels?
    You mean the law about not going through red lights, you complete weapon?

    Leave a comment:


  • OwlHoot
    replied
    Originally posted by malvolio View Post
    What accident? It was an incompetent f***up, nothing accidental about it.
    Been there done that, bombing over this fecking thing in a side street in Ladbroke Grove a few years ago, at 50 MPH one dark rainy night so I didn't see it!:

    giant circular bump in middle of road

    Actually, I'm pretty sure it was much higher back then. I was damned lucky not to completely knacker my suspension!

    It's easily done, and I didn't even have the excuse of a bawling infant in the back of the car!

    Leave a comment:


  • malvolio
    replied
    Originally posted by Platypus View Post
    This accident occurred very near where I live I know the road well.
    What accident? It was an incompetent f***up, nothing accidental about it.

    Leave a comment:

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