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Previously on "Paying cash into the bank"

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  • lukemg
    replied
    'Stuff it all in your wallet and pockets and feel epic'

    Loving that !

    I was surprised in the same way when a chap turned up on a train and bunged me 6k for my golf.
    Immediate concerns - is this all kosher, will I get a knock on the door later from his mates, where do I stash it in the house (behind skirting under kitchen cupboard - yeah I know not great).
    Started spending a bit and didnt get any issues, used cash for everything and bunged about 4 k in the bank - one 20 note was snide but the rest ok thank fck....

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by Sysman View Post
    That reminds me of the Rab C. Nesbitt episode where he goes into a rough pub looking for a hitman.

    The whole transaction was done in the style you ask a barman to get a taxi for you.
    The type of pub where they ask you at the door if you have a weapon? If you say no you get offered one...

    Leave a comment:


  • Sysman
    replied
    Originally posted by zeitghost
    How many do you want done? Just asking, like.
    That reminds me of the Rab C. Nesbitt episode where he goes into a rough pub looking for a hitman.

    The whole transaction was done in the style you ask a barman to get a taxi for you.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by Platypus View Post
    I heard of someone recently who had to "fill a form/questionnaire in" to pay £3k into the bank. Probably some bloke down the pub.

    Anyway, if I were you, I wouldn't pay cash into the bank. Cash is a wonderful untraceable thing that should be stashed in a cubby hole somewhere, to be used when you need it, e.g. paying some geezer to bump off the missus, buying drugs, buying gifts for the mistress, etc. OK, you probably won't get a hit for a mere £3k but it's a start.
    But what about the interest you could earn?

    Oh yeah - I take your point....

    Leave a comment:


  • original PM
    replied
    Originally posted by VectraMan View Post
    I'd bet some Libyan immigrants would be up for it. Another good reason to allow more of them in.

    Paid in the money. No questions asked.
    Finding people to do it is not the problem.

    Finding people who are good enough at it not to get caught and lead the rozzers back to you is the challenge.


    erm apparently.

    Leave a comment:


  • VectraMan
    replied
    Originally posted by Platypus View Post
    OK, you probably won't get a hit for a mere £3k but it's a start.
    I'd bet some Libyan immigrants would be up for it. Another good reason to allow more of them in.

    Paid in the money. No questions asked.

    Leave a comment:


  • FatLazyContractor
    replied
    Originally posted by Platypus View Post
    Anyway, if I were you, I wouldn't pay cash into the bank. Cash is a wonderful untraceable thing that should be stashed in a cubby hole somewhere, to be used when you need it, e.g. paying some geezer to bump off the missus, buying drugs, buying gifts for the mistress, etc. OK, you probably won't get a hit for a mere £3k but it's a start.
    Never was a truer piece of wisdom better said.

    Leave a comment:


  • Platypus
    replied
    I heard of someone recently who had to "fill a form/questionnaire in" to pay £3k into the bank. Probably some bloke down the pub.

    Anyway, if I were you, I wouldn't pay cash into the bank. Cash is a wonderful untraceable thing that should be stashed in a cubby hole somewhere, to be used when you need it, e.g. paying some geezer to bump off the missus, buying drugs, buying gifts for the mistress, etc. OK, you probably won't get a hit for a mere £3k but it's a start.

    Leave a comment:


  • VectraMan
    replied
    Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
    You stole the church fund? You are Arthur Fowler and I claim my five shouts of 'Ricky!!!!!'
    Christmas Club money. To pay for 'Chelle and Lofty's wedding.

    Why do I know this stuff?

    Leave a comment:


  • MarillionFan
    replied
    Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post
    A few years ago, I paid £26'000 in cash at a UK bank. To comply with money laundering regulations, I had to declare where the money come from. It was all straightforward and simple.

    You stole the church fund? You are Arthur Fowler and I claim my five shouts of 'Ricky!!!!!'

    Leave a comment:


  • NotAllThere
    replied
    A few years ago, I paid £26'000 in cash at a UK bank. To comply with money laundering regulations, I had to declare where the money come from. It was all straightforward and simple.

    Leave a comment:


  • FatLazyContractor
    replied
    Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
    Wow! A contractor thinks 3k is a large amount. I used to blow that on a night out. Contractors ain't what they used to be.
    Bunga Bunga parties?

    Leave a comment:


  • MarillionFan
    replied
    Originally posted by VectraMan View Post
    Sold my old car and the buyer gave me a wodge of twenties and tenners. I was wondering whether I can still go to the bank and get a human to count it in front of me, because these days they want you to put in an envelope and put it in the Ghostbusters machine.

    A quick google and there's stories of banks not being able to accept large amounts of cash because of money laundering regulations.

    Anyone know? It's about £3K.

    Or should I just spend it on one great night of coke and hookers?
    Wow! A contractor thinks 3k is a large amount. I used to blow that on a night out. Contractors ain't what they used to be.

    Leave a comment:


  • FatLazyContractor
    replied
    Originally posted by VectraMan View Post
    I bow to your superior knowledge of the subject.
    Gee thanks Experience makes one perfect

    Originally posted by VectraMan View Post

    I guess for £3K you could get an hour with a pretty decent high class whore, or 3,000 nights with AndyW's Mum. Not sure which is better.
    £3K an hour?!!!! You are not talking about Poundshop Kate or HM ER II, are you?

    Leave a comment:


  • VectraMan
    replied
    Originally posted by FatLazyContractor View Post
    Oxfordshire hookers are too expensive, fecking southerners.
    I bow to your superior knowledge of the subject.

    I guess for £3K you could get an hour with a pretty decent high class whore, or 3,000 nights with AndyW's Mum. Not sure which is better.

    Leave a comment:

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