• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Reply to: WTF is an ASBO?

Collapse

You are not logged in or you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

  • You are not logged in. If you are already registered, fill in the form below to log in, or follow the "Sign Up" link to register a new account.
  • You may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
  • If you are trying to post, the administrator may have disabled your account, or it may be awaiting activation.

Previously on "WTF is an ASBO?"

Collapse

  • Emperor Dalek
    replied
    Originally posted by Helios
    Deport me to desserted pacific island with a villa and a bar, with loads of women in bikinis
    Would that be an island strewn with assorted puddings?

    Leave a comment:


  • CaribbeanPirate
    replied
    Originally posted by Helios
    Deport me to desserted pacific island with a villa and a bar, with loads of women in bikinis
    Now you are catching on. It's the only way to get on in this world.

    Leave a comment:


  • Helios
    replied
    This was said in humour. About the only thing I did was spend some counterfeit currency.

    Deport me to desserted pacific island with a villa and a bar, with loads of women in bikinis

    Leave a comment:


  • Mailman
    replied
    Originally posted by oraclesmith
    Is there anywhere we can deport you to ?

    PS. It's Dragunov.
    Probably not because that might infringe his human rights

    Mailman

    Leave a comment:


  • Xenophon
    replied
    This seems to be the "I'm well 'ard thread"

    I once gave this kid at school a chinese burn for stealing my Optimus Prime Transformer. Afterwards he said it really hurt.

    Leave a comment:


  • CaribbeanPirate
    replied
    Originally posted by Helios
    Ok I been bad when I was younger. I robbed shops, old ladies and police. I also faked the queens head in a number of stores. I sold credit card. I sold stolen phones and laptops on ebay.

    Been in jail three times. 1st driving vehicle while banned with a firearm (glock 17L), 2nd Affray (fractured some street fighters skull with a key), 3 Counterfeiting (passed 3k in mcdonalds stores before scotland yard noticed mastauche and beard was fake). Had two community rehab orders, both for possessing firearms with intent to supply, (not AK47s just gas guns that you buy in a firearms store), but selling cheap, said i was drunk at the time.

    Why the hell did no one give me an asbo? I sold a former soviet Drugonov rifle for parts online, yet when I get into trouble I either get jail or fine. Why cant I qualify for an asbo? Do I have to shave my head and support a football team to get an asbo cert here?
    Good man. My Hero!

    Leave a comment:


  • oraclesmith
    replied
    Originally posted by Helios
    Ok I been bad when I was younger. I robbed shops, old ladies and police. I also faked the queens head in a number of stores. I sold credit card. I sold stolen phones and laptops on ebay.

    Been in jail three times. 1st driving vehicle while banned with a firearm (glock 17L), 2nd Affray (fractured some street fighters skull with a key), 3 Counterfeiting (passed 3k in mcdonalds stores before scotland yard noticed mastauche and beard was fake). Had two community rehab orders, both for possessing firearms with intent to supply, (not AK47s just gas guns that you buy in a firearms store), but selling cheap, said i was drunk at the time.

    Why the hell did no one give me an asbo? I sold a former soviet Drugonov rifle for parts online, yet when I get into trouble I either get jail or fine. Why cant I qualify for an asbo? Do I have to shave my head and support a football team to get an asbo cert here?
    Is there anywhere we can deport you to ?

    PS. It's Dragunov.

    Leave a comment:


  • xoggoth
    replied
    Faking the queens head in a number of stores sounds intriguing.

    Leave a comment:


  • expat
    replied
    Originally posted by Helios
    ...when I get into trouble I either get jail or fine. Why cant I qualify for an asbo? Do I have to shave my head and support a football team to get an asbo cert here?
    AIUI ASBOs order you not to do something that is antisocial but not in itself illegal. For actually breaking the law, you get a punishment.

    PS looks like you don't get into trouble, you are the trouble. No offence.

    Leave a comment:


  • Bovvered
    replied
    No wonder you can't get a job.

    Leave a comment:


  • milanbenes
    replied



    Milan.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    ASBOs only recently came in

    But IMO you escaped lightly. Friend of mine has a "fit persons order" placed on him - this was in the sixties. However it started his downward spiral - he has since been away twice, once for armed robbery and once for breaking his ex-wife's skull (her brother is a convicted nonce and went near the kids - he went to give him a slap and she got in the way). The good news is he met me and we did a few civil rights stunts together.

    Isn't contracting enough for you?

    Leave a comment:


  • Helios
    started a topic WTF is an ASBO?

    WTF is an ASBO?

    Ok I been bad when I was younger. I robbed shops, old ladies and police. I also faked the queens head in a number of stores. I sold credit card. I sold stolen phones and laptops on ebay.

    Been in jail three times. 1st driving vehicle while banned with a firearm (glock 17L), 2nd Affray (fractured some street fighters skull with a key), 3 Counterfeiting (passed 3k in mcdonalds stores before scotland yard noticed mastauche and beard was fake). Had two community rehab orders, both for possessing firearms with intent to supply, (not AK47s just gas guns that you buy in a firearms store), but selling cheap, said i was drunk at the time.

    Why the hell did no one give me an asbo? I sold a former soviet Drugonov rifle for parts online, yet when I get into trouble I either get jail or fine. Why cant I qualify for an asbo? Do I have to shave my head and support a football team to get an asbo cert here?

Working...
X