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Previously on "Why do the Germans do everything better?"

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  • lukemg
    replied
    Originally posted by DaveB
    Yep, saw that one. Very impressive house it was too. The German guys turned up as described and actually looked like they knew what they were doing before they even got started. The Brits with the crane were the usual duffers with no more than half a clue between them.
    Yep, I saw this - awesome, brits were stopping constantly for a brew/bacon and generally milling around without a clue. Squareheads were like a machine, totally focussed, ruthlessly efficient, house built, van cleaned off they go.
    As far as the war is concerned, Germans had the best fighting force on the planet, best equipment, tactics, personnel. They ripped through the best that europe could offer as if they weren't there (Dunkirk was a crushing defeat, not the victory people have in their propaganda fuelled heads). In the end they were out supplied (equipment and russians)and spread too thin, if they had kept ambitions more modest (i.e. agreement with the Russians) then they could have controlled europe for a long time.

    Leave a comment:


  • IR35 Avoider
    replied
    A completely different story of non-British efficiency:-

    I was skiing in the USA when I got a very sore throat. I drove to a local GP (easy to find because of big signs pointing the way and boasting about their on-site X-rays.) Now I admit that as I got there just before they opened there wasn't a queue, but the way they handled the consultation was amazing.

    Went straight to reception. Receptionist took my details and then led me to the examining room. As she left the desk someone else moved in to take her place and deal with the next customer. (It only took her 20 seconds to take me there - although it wasn't complicated I imagine that was still quicker on average than having a conversation with someone to explain to them where to go.) After 30 seconds a doctor came in. He was in the room for about a minute during which time he took a throat swab. A few minutes later he returned with the analysis of the swab. He told me the prescription, what it would cost, and said I could get it from them or a pharmacy. He told me what the pharmacy across the road would charge.

    I went back to reception and paid for the consultation and the prescription with a credit card.

    I walked out of the building ten minutes after I had entered it.

    Contrast this with seeing my GP here. Firstly, here I need an appointment. So I phone up and ask for one. They tell me they can fit me in in two weeks time. I tell them that by then I'll either have recovered on my own or died, so there's not much point.

    I have managed to get to see a GP in the UK four of five times in the last 15 years, but only once when I actually had something immediately wrong with me.

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  • DaveB
    replied
    Originally posted by IR35 Avoider
    Huf Haus. And I've wanted one for years.

    They usually build a house (on the already laid concrete slab) in one week. (Foundations done before the week and interior finishing (tiling etc.) done after.)

    In the program, the builders arrived from Germany and were ready to commence work at 7am on Monday. Unfortunately they had to then wait until 11am for the British crane driver to find the site.

    Despite the delay, because they wanted to be sure to be back in Germany for an important football match, they worked longer hours and finished by Thursday afternoon.

    As I remember it, they had five or six people working on it for the first three days, then the team was decreased to two, according to schedule.

    Yep, saw that one. Very impressive house it was too. The German guys turned up as described and actually looked like they knew what they were doing before they even got started. The Brits with the crane were the usual duffers with no more than half a clue between them.

    Leave a comment:


  • IR35 Avoider
    replied
    It was the Hofhaus
    Huf Haus. And I've wanted one for years.

    They usually build a house (on the already laid concrete slab) in one week. (Foundations done before the week and interior finishing (tiling etc.) done after.)

    In the program, the builders arrived from Germany and were ready to commence work at 7am on Monday. Unfortunately they had to then wait until 11am for the British crane driver to find the site.

    Despite the delay, because they wanted to be sure to be back in Germany for an important football match, they worked longer hours and finished by Thursday afternoon.

    As I remember it, they had five or six people working on it for the first three days, then the team was decreased to two, according to schedule.

    Leave a comment:


  • Emperor Dalek
    replied
    Originally posted by sasguru
    Well it took 3 countries to do 'em. Arguably they had the best army.
    They had the best uniforms too.

    Leave a comment:


  • bogeyman
    replied
    Originally posted by Gibbon
    Can't see that picture CP, and I actually met her in a pub.
    Me too.

    Leave a comment:


  • Gibbon
    replied
    Can't see that picture CP, and I actually met her in a pub.

    Leave a comment:


  • CaribbeanPirate
    replied
    Originally posted by Gibbon
    I hope they do sex better as I'm off to se a german bird this weekend
    Is this her?

    Leave a comment:


  • Andyw
    replied
    Originally posted by Gibbon
    I hope they do sex better as I'm off to se a german bird this weekend

    anyone ever told you internet dating can be risky ?

    Leave a comment:


  • Gibbon
    replied
    I hope they do sex better as I'm off to se a german bird this weekend

    Leave a comment:


  • ASB
    replied
    Originally posted by sasguru
    Yes. That's a good example. It was the Hofhaus. Was seriously thinking of getting one.
    Planning is a right nuisance for them. You'll need a good agent to get through PP.

    My wife has had some involvement in this sort of project. Don't let a British builder anywhere near it would be a very good rule of thumb.

    Leave a comment:


  • Bagpuss
    replied
    Andy, you are the Peter Ustinov of Moaning.co.uk, sorry I mean CUK

    Leave a comment:


  • Andyw
    replied
    Typically sas

    Londoners
    A Londoner parks his brand new Porsche in front of the office to show it
    >off to his colleagues.
    >>
    >As he's getting out of the car, a lorry comes speeding along too close to
    >the kerb and takes off the door before zooming off.
    >
    >
    >More than a little distraught, the Londoner grabs his mobile and calls the
    >police.
    >
    >Five minutes later, the police arrive.
    >
    >Before the policeman has a chance to ask any questions, the man starts
    >screaming hysterically: "My Porsche, my beautiful silver Porsche is
    >ruined.
    >

    No matter how long it's at the panel beaters it'll simply never be the same
    again!"
    >
    After the man finally finishes his rant, the policeman shakes his head in
    disgust.
    >
    >"I can't believe how materialistic you bloody Londoners are," he says."You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life."

    >"How can you say such a thing at a time like this?" sobs the Porsche owner.

    The policeman replies, "Didn't you realise that your left arm was torn off when the truck hit you."

    The Londoner looks down in horror ........"F***ING HELL !" he screams........

    "Where's my Rolex ????.

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  • Bagpuss
    replied
    Has Hasslehoff a Hoffhaus?

    Leave a comment:


  • sasguru
    replied
    Originally posted by oraclesmith
    Because they stay focussed. Take the architect/house programme on the TV a while back where these Germans deliver a complete system built house (can't remember the name of the programme or the house company). They had every detail of this construction down to the millimeter. The components were built in a leading edge factory in Germany and everything was tested before shipping. The German workmen focussed totally on the task. Every piece was shipped over in huge lorries and it all fitted precisely into place. There was minimal waste of materials and it went in exactly on time. It was very impressive.

    Imagine if a British firm tried to do the same thing, using British builders ! They would subcontract to different firms, resulting in parts which didn't fit together on site because one firms idea of 101mm is somehow different to anothers ! Some of the material would arrive late because of cash flow problems, technical difficulties or myriad other excuses. The workmen putting it together would be a loose mob of subcontractors, more interested in what's on Sky tonight than getting the job done. Or am I being cynical ?
    Yes. That's a good example. It was the Hofhaus. Was seriously thinking of getting one.

    Leave a comment:

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