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Two arms, one eye and a mouth that spat.

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    Two arms, one eye and a mouth that spat.

    Once upon a time, there was a young boy, and this young boy
    was having his 10th birthday. His father thinking that it
    was an important day for his young lad, said to him, 'You
    can have anything that you want for your birthday'.
    The boy thought and thought. Finally, he said to his pop,
    "Dad, I want a green golf ball." The man was surprised a
    bit, but decided to humour his son. And so, the boy
    received 1 green golf ball for his 10th birthday.

    On this boy's 13th birthday, when he hit his teens, the
    father once again walked up to the boy, and told him what he
    had before. The boy thought. And thought. Finally, he said,
    "Dad, I want 10 green golf balls." Now, the father was
    slightly curious about this, and he almost asked his son
    why. But then he decided that it was just youthfulness, and
    left it at that.

    Upon graduating from High School, the boy was once again
    given that same offer by his father. He thought and thought
    and thought. Finally, he went up to his old man and said,
    "Dad, I want 100 green golf balls." Now, the father was very
    curious about this, and asked his son, finally, why he
    wanted the balls. The boy just said, "Dad! It's a secret!"
    The father backed down, and got the boy his balls.

    When the boy graduated from college, his father once again
    offered him anything he wanted. Once again, the boy thought.
    Once again, the boy walked up to his father. He said, "Dad,
    I want 1000 green golf balls." The father decided that the
    boy knew how to live his life. But still he asked, "Why,
    son? Why do you want these green golf balls?" And once
    again, the boy said,"It's a secret, Dad!"

    And then came the war. And the boy volunteered himself for
    his country. And when he came back in one piece, his father
    said, "Son, I will get you anything that you want!" And the
    boy thought. And thought. And he said, "Dad, I want 10,000
    green golfballs." And the father could not hold back his
    question any longer. "Why? Why, son? Why do you need these
    green golf balls?" And the son looked at him, and he
    said,"Dad, now, I told you that it was a secret. Please
    don't make me tell you." And the father backed off.

    The boy got married. His father walked up to him, and
    offered him anything he would want on this joyous occasion.
    The boy thought and thought and thought. And thought. And,
    finally, he said,"Dad... I want 100,000 green golf balls..."
    And the father, keeping calm, asked why. Why the boy wanted
    so many green golf balls. And all the boy could do was look
    at his father, and say,"It's a secret." And the father kept
    silent.

    Then, tragedy struck. There was a car accident. The boy was
    mortally injured. And the father went to see the son in his
    final hour. And he asked his son if there was anything he
    could get him. And the son whispered,"Father... Please get
    me 1,000,000 green golf balls..." And the father almost
    wept. He said,"Son, please tell me why you want these green
    golf balls..." And the son looked at his father, and he
    said, "Alright, dad..."

    And then he died.
    Brexit is having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.

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