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Milli Vanilli

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    Milli Vanilli

    Following last weeks (sic) shocking revelation that Milli Vanilli front-
    men Rob Pilatus and Fabrice Morvan did not sing on their own records, th
    controversy surrounding this multi-million-selling pop duo has continued
    to unravel with a series of further startling claims.

    The band were stripped of their 1988 Grammy Award for Best Singers when
    it was revealed that Texan session men Johnny Davis, Charles Shaw and
    Brad Howell provided all the vocals on the LP's 'All or Nothing' and
    'Let's Face It, Nothing Actually'. But it has now come to light that it
    wasn't even Davis,Shaw and Howell who provided the singing, but a studio
    dog called Rufus, a 5 year old German Shepherd owned by Dwight Flemm,
    resident engineer at Songalone Studios in Connecticut.

    Hence, the Texan trio's 1988 Grammy for Best Backing Vocals has been
    repossesd. And as if that wasn't enough, a catering assistant from
    Milli Vanilli's '88 US tour has come forward with the claim that Rob
    Pilatus is not the father of her illegitmate child, Zak, as she had
    previously stated in a Federal Court. In fact, she now admits, a roadie
    in a deadlock wig called Doozer actually shagged her pretending to be
    the dapper Vanilli frontman. Six similiar claims are said to be pending.

    The beleagured German disco twosome are not to be left alone. A New York
    tabloid ran an exclusive expose on Thursday pointing the finger at
    Pilatus and Morvan saying THEY CAN'T EVEN DANCE! An investigation into
    Vanilli's video promo's confirms that it is not Rob and Fabrice wiggling
    about sexily on the screen, but cleverly cut footage of Paula Abdul and
    Janet Jackson. Their 1988 Best Dancing Grammy is now in jeopardy.
    Milli Vanilli are not actually called Milli Vanilli, their hair is false
    and it wasn't even them speaking when they claimed to speak at all their
    own press conferences.
    Brexit is having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.

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