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A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a salmon under his arm and asks "do you do fish cakes?" The shop owner replies "yes." So the man says "well this salmon is a year old. make it a cake."
A man and his wife were celebrating their 60th birthdays and 35th wedding anniversary. He opened her gift to him, a greenn vase, and a genie appeared and granted him a wish. The man said "I want a wife 40 years younger than I am." So the Genie made him 100.
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