Is calling her a "leaching cancerous b*tch" going a bit too far? Dating hell

[d000hg]

Exactly. The fat ones generally try harder in bed too. Well that's my experience with fat lasses like MF s missus, doogies missus etc.

We've seen your photo, if anyone's a try-hard...

[Old Greg]

If you're the type of person who wants to pick up students and on top of that would cancel because they're a tiny bit chubby, serves you bloody well right.

Judge not...

[KentPhilip]

I think the word is "leech" but apart from that it sounds fine.

Thanks for the correction.

On the other hand you could call her smart, intelligent and switched on for playing you like an absolute fool and laughing about it with her mates while you moan about it on a public forum

Yes, but I have better things to do.

In my experience everything she told you treat as a total fabrication. She was probably the daughter of the college caretaker.

Perhaps. But she had a plummy voice, and some of the things she said gave credence to her story.

WHS. Lucky Escape.

Factor 1: Personality "Aggressive narcissism"

Glibness/superficial charm
Grandiose sense of self-worth
Pathological lying
Cunning/manipulative
Lack of remorse or guilt
Shallow affect (genuine emotion is short-lived and egocentric)
Callousness; lack of empathy
Failure to accept responsibility for his or her own actions

Factor 2: Case history "Socially deviant lifestyle."

Need for stimulation/proneness to boredom
Parasitic lifestyle
Poor behavioral control
Lack of realistic long-term goals
Impulsivity
Irresponsibility
Juvenile delinquency
Early behavior problems
Revocation of conditional release


The Hare Checklist for Psychopathy. Hare Psychopathy Checklist - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Required reading before a blind date.

In other words if I do slag her off in any meaningful way she'll come for my juggulars. With a squadron of hitmen financed by her rich parents.

Oh FFS!

I may have been out of the dating game for a while but if you're this upset because you forked out for a G+T and some spring rolls but didn't get your oats, you're in for a miserable lonely existence.

It would have been nice for her to tell you before you paid the bill! How would that have made any difference to the outcome?

I hardly think that dinner and a drink counts as gold digger material.

Just suck it up and move on.

Maybe. But it just seemed so deliberate her conning me out of the dosh, and blatently lying.
If she had such a good education she would know not to treat people like dirt. Well not like dirt unless you have something big to gain from it.

She was 21? How old are you?

Perhaps you need to get better at reading the signs when somebody isn't interested.

Even genuine women will generally have an escape plan for an internet date. It's possible she hadn't thought ahead and was just so desperate to escape that she forgot her book.

Alternatively, perhaps you are a victim of "rinsing"

Much older than 21. But I raised this point when I first got chatting to her. She said on her profile that she only liked younger guys. I said why did you accept my chat request, given that I'm older. She said she had changed her mind and now wanted to try dating older guys. I thought hey ho let's see what happens.

If you're the type of person who wants to pick up students and on top of that would cancel because they're a tiny bit chubby, serves you bloody well right.

From the photos I didn't fancy her. So I thought I'd be straight with her - I didn't want to waste her time. But she still wanted to meet me, so I said OK. Honesty is the best policy.

FFS, so many red flags in that story and never once you got suspicious of her ? What were you doing, thinking with your dick ? I bet she spun a story of how you can make lusty love to her on the dorm bed with her room mate watching.

Not quite. But yes.
I thought being a Oxford student might mean she wasn't a complete timewaster. Wrong.


OK thanks all for taking the time to read my rant. I feel a bit better now you've all slagged me off

I'll put it down to experience, and move on..

[AtW]

I thought being a Oxford student might mean she wasn't a complete timewaster. Wrong.

Maybe she just lied that she was studying at Oxford?

[KentPhilip]

Maybe she just lied that she was studying at Oxford?

Well she walked through the porter's lodge at that college, and I know well those places are guarded well, given the influx of tourists etc in the centre of Oxford.

Well well well.

[AtW]

Well she walked through the porter's lodge at that college

She'll make an excellent Foreign Minister then

[SimonMac]

I'm still smarting today over an experience on Saturday where I had a date go BADLY wrong.
OK I got chatting to her on an online dating website, and she said she was an Oxford university undergraduate (one of the famous colleges I won't name, age 21. We agreed for me to come up to Oxford (40 mile drive) that evening for drinks and a nice meal. I would have to pay for both of these because "she was completely skint".

She sent through a photo, and she was ever so slightly chubby, so I said no.
"pleeeeeese" she retorted. Oh all right then.

So we met at the main gate of the college, and had drinks first, then a chinese meal. She was OK

She was very interesting, having been to one of the top girls public schools in the country, parents multi-millionaires, and they had introduced her to Tony Blair. Reference from Margaret Becket.

Near the end of the meal I went to the loo, but when I got back she was gone. Huh?

So I called her and asked what was up, and she said her sister had had a car crash, but was not injured. I suggested postponing the date to another time, and by the way what shall I do with a book she had left in the restaurant.
She said no she would come over to a local pub to meet me. Which she did (I returned the book).

She wanted a double gin&tonic, which I bought. Then she asked to borrow £10 to buy some cigarettes, which I gave to her, though I was by then suspicious of her motives.

Then on the way back to her place her pass didn't work. She asked me to wait outside the porter's lodge of the college while she renewed it. "I'll only be a second, a minute" before she disappeared inside the lodge of this world famous college.

I waited and waited, but she never came out. She had done a runner, and of course I could not go through into the college as it was closed to visitors and guarded by three burly male porters as you might expect.

She broke off all contact.


Now if she didn't like me fair enough. Though it would have been nice if she had let me know before I forked out for the nosh. But to intentionally come back and rip me off for a further double-gin and £10 is well out of order I think. FFS she comes from a loaded family, so what on earth was the point in trying to take money of me? What am I to her?

Should I send her a nasty hasteful message, and what should it say?

Bloody women!

Grrrrr!

That's why you should always get TWO references!

[EternalOptimist]

Meanwhile, in a dorm somewhere in Oxford, a bird is laying on her bed and laughing so hard she has tears running down her slightly chubby cheeks

[Old Greg]

It's all part of the confused gay man fancies female cleaner rollercoaster ride.

[KentPhilip]

It's all part of the confused gay man fancies female cleaner rollercoaster ride.

Well I do wonder whether our homo friends do get it easier in some ways