Demystifying Agent Speak

[TheFaQQer]

Can you talk me through your CV?
I haven't even bothered to get a copy, just a name came back when I searched

[TheFaQQer]

How would a role in <any location> be for you - is that near home?
I might have looked at where you are based, but unless it's London, I have no idea where anywhere else in the country is, particularly if you are in the north - is Yorkshire close to Aberdeen?

[TheFaQQer]

Is this a good time to talk?
I'm going to rabbit on anyway, regardless of your reply

In the interest of fairness, not all agents ask this question.

If they don't, it's a fishing exercise because they aren't interested in inconveniencing you.

[TheFaQQer]

I've got an exciting opportunity
I've got a permanent role, which is pretty boring, and 40% less than you earn at the moment.

[Zippy]

I have a number of roles that I'm recruiting for
That number is zero

[Zippy]

So I see you're working at Acme Co?

Yep.

Oh Fred works there doesn't he? We've done quite a lot of business with Fred and SAP over there.

(Fred hasn't worked at Acme for two years. They have never used SAP. ) It's just so bloody insulting.

[amcdonald]

How would a role in <any location> be for you - is that near home?
I might have looked at where you are based, but unless it's London, I have no idea where anywhere else in the country is, particularly if you are in the north - is Yorkshire close to Aberdeen?

Or worse they plain lie about the location....

I was offered a role 'close to London', agent speak meaning the HQ was in London, the interview would be in London, but it would involve commuting to Edinburgh 5 days a week

[TheFaQQer]

The role is based in <a convenient location to you>
Once your security clearance has come through, which could take up to six months. Even when it does, you'll still be based in Slough because that's where the project is, but if I told you that from the start you wouldn't have been interested.

[Old Greg]

Would you be interested in a permanent role?

Kick me to the ground and stamp on my face until my cheekbones snap like autumn twigs. I deserve it.

[suityou01]

Company policy

Try this, the next time you get a call from an Agency in a crap market.

"Hi, can I speak to Suity please?"

"May I ask who's calling?"

"Yeah sure, it's mike at ******* international?"

"Will he know what it's regarding?"

"No, I just want to check his availability for a role that's all"

"Ah, ok fine, his availability is now, his rate is £xxx"

"Sure, but can I speak to him?"

"I'm afraid he's in a meeting right now, if you give me your number I'll get him to call you back as soon as he's out of it, or better yet why not drop him an email with some details, and perhaps a job spec?"