An essay on Global Warming

**Paddy** · 30 March 2013, 18:46

The subject of wanking has been covered intensively by the world press over the past decade. There are many factors which influenced the development of wanking. Though wanking is a favourite topic of discussion amongst monarchs, presidents and dictators, several of todays most brilliant minds seem incapable of recognising its increasing relevance to understanding future generations. Often it is seen as both a help and a hinderence to global commercial enterprises, trapped by their infamous history. Relax, sit back and gasp as I display the rich tapestries of wanking.

Social Factors

There is cultural and institutional interdependence between members of any community. Back when Vealinger reamarked ‘the power struggle will continue while the great tale of humanity remains untold’ [1] he was clearly refering to the impact of wanking on today's society. Much has been said about the influence of the media on wanking. Observers claim it demonstrates a coherent approach, something so lacking in our culture, that it is not recognised by all.

Status, Security, Fame - wanking, all revolve around this 'golden fleece'. It grows stonger every day.

Economic Factors

Economics has been defined as 'I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine.' To my learned ear that sounds like two people with itchy backs. We shall examine the Custard-Not-Mustard model using the median instead of the mean, where possible. Housing
Prices

wanking

There is no longer a need to argue the importance of wanking, it is clear to see that the results speak for themselves. The question which surfaces now is, how? Recent studies indicate that housing prices cannot sustain this instability for long. In the light of this free trade must be examined.

Political Factors

Modern politics owes much to the animal kingdom. Comparing the electoral politics of most Western and Eastern European countries is like comparing pre and post war views of wanking.

We cannot talk of wanking and politics without remembering the words of style icon Esperanza Bootlegger 'Man's greatest enemy is complacency with regards to personal and political hygiene.' [2] Considered by many to be one of the 'Founding Fathers' of wanking, his words cannot be over-looked. Perhaps the word which sums up the importance of wanking to politics is 'participation'.

Since the Renaissance wanking has become more and more prevalent. May it continue.
Conclusion

How much responsibility lies with wanking? We can say that wanking plays a large part in the lives of all. It collaborates successfully, ensures financial stability and figures show it's a winning formular.

I shall give the final word to star Justin Hendrix: 'wanking is the new rock and roll! And the new opera!' [3]

**EternalOptimist** · 30 March 2013, 19:54

tantrum:
I am normally an easy-going bloke, I am not political and I always like to hear the other sides opinion.

But this thread has treated lightly a subject that is too important for the future of mankind/civilisation, and it has made me mad. This is a serious subject and it's no laughing matter.
I have heard all the arguments about how it affects ones eyesight, but I remain a sceptic and will wank furiously till the day I die (of global warming)