Dwarfs

[OwlHoot]

I seem to be seeing them around a lot more these days.

There is one by the bus stop most days I go to the pub, and there must be a dating site or something because I saw a nice couple in Tescos the other week. In fact she looked mighty attractive

Look out for the dwarf throwing olympic event, unless the spoil sports have banned it

[Halo Jones]

In fact she looked mighty attractive

How could you tell if one was female? I thought they all had beards

[Pondlife]

How could you tell if one was female? I thought they all had beards

Here you go HJ.

As Tolkien implied of his dwarves, Discworld dwarfs of both sexes have beards. However, while Tolkien stated that female dwarves are rare, and disguise themselves as male when they must travel, female Discworld dwarfs are common, but are traditionally indistinguishable from males at all times.

Dwarfs prefer not to spend much time on the subject; the dwarfish language has a gender neutral pronoun, usually rendered as "he" when speaking human languages. Dwarfish courtship is an incredibly tactful affair, primarily concerned with finding out which gender the other dwarf is (this may have been retconned by the time of the novel, 'Thud', where it is stated that Samuel Vimes, a human, has picked up a knack for judging the gender of dwarfs, making it likely that they are able to tell amongst themselves).

Despite the awkwardness that comes of this, it is traditionally considered rude to discuss female dwarfs in conversation.

[BrilloPad]

of course cuk has its own resident dwarf - stand up spod!

What do you mean you are standing up?

[KentPhilip]

Did you hear about the dwarf psychic who escaped from prison?

Police have announced there is a small medium at large!

A topical joke for today. Well done..

[mudskipper]

FFS, It's DWARVES.

[mudskipper]

FFS, It's DWARVES.

... or not.

English plural - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

For dwarf, the common form of the plural was dwarfs —as, for example, in Walt Disney's Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs— until J. R. R. Tolkien popularized dwarves; he intended the changed spelling to differentiate the "dwarf" fantasy race in his novels from the cuter and simpler beings common in fairy tales, but his usage has since spread. Multiple astronomical dwarf stars and multiple nonmythological short human beings, however, remain dwarfs.

[carlosLondon]

I seem to be seeing them around a lot more these days.

There is one by the bus stop most days I go to the pub, and there must be a dating site or something because I saw a nice couple in Tescos the other week. In fact she looked mighty attractive

I'm not seeing many dwarves around, but I've noticed lots and lots of gingers around...

[GeorgeB]

I'm not seeing many dwarves around, but I've noticed lots and lots of gingers around...

Have you tried looking in a downwards direction?

[MarillionFan]

I'm not seeing many dwarves around, but I've noticed lots and lots of gingers around...

Ever noticed you can't get midget ginger porn. It's just sick.