Waste of time in a nutshell

[Churchill]

I'll get my coatt

That's my boy!

[GBH123]

DOn't read Unix in a nutshell, the plot is crap

We will fix it, we will mend it, we will make it work

[DaveB]

Kernel Mustard

In the Stack with a MALLOC!

[Churchill]

We will fix it, we will mend it, we will make it work

The Marvellous Mechanical Mouse Organ!!!

(What's marvellous about a mouse's organ?)

[GBH123]

The Marvellous Mechanical Mouse Organ!!!

(What's marvellous about a mouse's organ?)

Have you every tried to play one ??

[Churchill]

Have you every tried to play one ??

I would imagine my paws are too big.

[DaveB]

Have you every tried to play one ??

The trick is getting the little buggers to stand still long enough

[DaveB]

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Ladies and gentlemen. I have in this box twenty-three white mice. Mice which have been painstakingly trained over the past few years, to squeak at a selected pitch. (he raises a mouse by its tail) This is E sharp... and this one is G. You get the general idea. Noe these mice are so arranged upon this rack, that when played in the correct order they will squeak 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you on the mouse organ 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Thank you.

He produces two mallets. He starts striking the mice while singing quietly 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Each downward stroke of the mallet brings a terribly squashing sound and the expiring squeak. It is quite clear that he is slaughtering the mice. The musical effect is poor. After the first few notes people are shouting 'Stop it, stop him someone, Oh my God'. He cheerfully takes a bow. He is hauled off by the floor manager.

[ladymuck]

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Ladies and gentlemen. I have in this box twenty-three white mice. Mice which have been painstakingly trained over the past few years, to squeak at a selected pitch. (he raises a mouse by its tail) This is E sharp... and this one is G. You get the general idea. Noe these mice are so arranged upon this rack, that when played in the correct order they will squeak 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you on the mouse organ 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Thank you.

He produces two mallets. He starts striking the mice while singing quietly 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Each downward stroke of the mallet brings a terribly squashing sound and the expiring squeak. It is quite clear that he is slaughtering the mice. The musical effect is poor. After the first few notes people are shouting 'Stop it, stop him someone, Oh my God'. He cheerfully takes a bow. He is hauled off by the floor manager.

Cool! Do you do children's parties?

[threaded]

There was a cat piano once that worked much the same way.

Also there was a chap who threw elephants off cliffs as he like the sound they made as they fell.