Agony aunt required

[MaryPoppins]

Few options

1) Treat her like tulip for a while until she leaves you
2) Tell her you're gay
3) Get caught with someone else
4 Do a runner
5) Just tell her

I've done all five at some , but number 5 is the most difficult. Nothing worse than a lass clinging to your leg like a homesick turd.

...and they had suspected number 2 for some time, right?

[MarillionFan]

**** her over and ruin her holiday. Classy.

Make sure and film yourself having a threesome with a couple of hookers in the bed you share and leave it in the video for her to watch when she get in as well.

Is he a Premiership footballer then?

[shaunbhoy]

Is he a Premiership footballer then?

He's either an Aussie or a Kiwi. So can only have reached Premiership levels at whining or belching.

HTH

[Mich the Tester]

I'm at a crossroads and I need a push.

Wrong forum, wrong location; we're only any good at pushing if you're standing on the edge of a tall building.

[HairyArsedBloke]

Learn to dress on the other side.

[cailin maith]

Oh dear

[lukemg]

Nice clean break I reckon. Don't leave her stuffed though, pay up what is needed and another months rent to keep her ticking over. Leave her a note making it clear you are not coming back. Of course it's the cowards way out but it's going to sting either way.
She will be expecting contact while she is away are you just going to 'go dark' ?

[NotAllThere]

Insure yourself to the hilt, with her as beneficiary. Then fake your own death. I'm sure many of us would be glad to make it look so incredibly real, that even you won't be able to tell.

[Paddy]

I'm at a crossroads and I need a push. I know that y'all are nothing if not candid, so maybe one of you can give me the verbal ass-kicking I need. Here's my personal situation:

* I've been with my girlfriend here in London for years and years.
* I can't bring myself to marry her
* I want to go back to NZ/Oz to be closer to my folks and my new neice whom I've never seen (and to escape the winter)
* My girlfriend is European and doesn't want to leave London
* She never wants to have kids

This is where it gets really dire:

* I can't bring myself to say goodbye, so my plan is to wait until she goes to the US for a short trip in November and then pack up and fly out.
* When she gets home I'm pretty sure she will be devastated.
* I don't know how I will handle being on my own after so many years with her, even though I've never been really happy with her.

Well, that's the gist of it. Any thoughts/comments are appreciated.

I've been through this a few times in my life and I went with my heart. It was a big mistake and cost me dearly. Please make my lost money, time and prospects worth my advice: dump her now!

[MarillionFan]

You are Minty from Eastenders and I claim my crisp £5