How much would you pay to read your genome?

[RichardCranium]

What would make me pay?

You need to get your hands on the DNA of two or three celebrities (e.g. Chris Eubanks and Gazza and Meera Syal) and some brainiacs (e.g. Einstein and Stephen Hawking) and some long dead people (there must be some tissue available e.g. Tutankhamun, a 'bog body' and a dead king or two). I want at least one murderer in there too.

Also, include the DNA for a chimpanzee, a dog and a banana.

Then compare my DNA with theirs and include it in the report.

I want a posh certificate with a shiny border, my name in posh writing and %age similarity between me and those other people.

Richard Cranium

Your DNA matches that of:

Gazza 99.997%
Meera Syal 99.996%
Chris Eubanks 99.995%
etc.
Bubbles 98.412%
Fido 97.613%
A banana 96.312%

Then I want a poncy report, as long as possible, giving me lots of statistics about every disease you have data on. Include in that the diseases still being researched.

Plus a couple of pages with pictures on human migration and my DNA's probable travels in that. In shiny ink too, not off a deskjet.

Bung all that in a nice folder.

As for the DVD, just put The Great Escape on it but rename the file Your-Very-Own-DNA.DAT and print my name on the CD.

I'd pay £125 for that as a gift for someone else.

BUT ... and here's the clever bit ... for £25 a year subscription, you continue to send me, every year, updates on the medical analysis as information becomes available plus a quarterly newsletter on DNA analysis progress, health matters (and adverts for insurance, medical devices and all that usual tulip). For a further £75 a year, you will send me email alerts on medical stats updates as soon as the research is done. <--- this last paragraph will make someone stupid rich.

[threaded]

I think the lowering cost and ease of DNA tests is a bit of a worry.

In pre-DNA days it was common for 30% of children not to be fathered by the chaps on the birth certificate.

With DNA testing this is rapidly dropping, leading to increases in childless families, and families with multiple disabled children, etc.

There are many such adverse effects due to narrowing of the spread of DNA across a population, and they're only slowly coming to light.

What happens if there are disastrous effects that only becomes apparent after several generations, n.b. the Spartans, the Roman Patricians, and European Royal families...

[OwlHoot]

Perhaps I would if I was approaching fatherhood but not now, I woudn't really want to know that I might be in line for dementia at 60 or whatever.

What will be will be.

But what if you could take remedial action against your weak points, such as finding out that a daily vitamin D pill, or avoiding chocolate or something, would benefit you more than most?

[RichardCranium]

But what if taking remedial action against your weak points, such as avoiding chocolate, would benefit you more than most?

You are not just doing a poor job of selling this, you're putting us off!

[Pogle]

But what if you could take remedial action against your weak points, such as finding out that a daily vitamin D pill, or avoiding chocolate or something, would benefit you more than most?

Now, you see that's where it all falls down for me

[Zippy]

It would save you from having to go on the Jeremy Kyle Show?

[norrahe]

It would save you from having to go on the Jeremy Kyle Show?

[DaveB]

Hmm don't think I'd be interested, what if it said I had a predisposition to some really rather unpleasant disease, would that mean I'm bound to get it? Would I spend the rest of my life waiting for it?
I remember seeing the documentary on Terry Pratchet and he was at one point with a doctor and his PA asked the Dr how long Terry had before his Alzheimers took him over. Terry shouted out "Don't answer that" and the Dr didn't. I think sometimes you can know too much.
As for knowing my ancestral race, I'm blonde and pale - so I'm guessing there may be a some viking in me genes

Lucky Bugger