The little things that annoy you

[shaunbhoy]

The faux-suspense paragraph structure that is compulsory in television history programmes nowadays.

You can't say "in 1066 William the Conqueror arrived in England".

It's got to be "On a drizzly March morning, a boat landed on a beach. A tall man in chainmail got out. He ate a croissant and smoked a Gitane. The beach was Margate; the year was 1066; and the man was William the Conqueror."

So are you suggesting that he got his wife to map read then??

[DodgyAgent]

Yes, and for doing only 99% of the work.

please make that 100%

[doodab]

So are you suggesting that he got his wife to map read then??

You think he was actually planning to invade somewhere sunny with decent food?

[shaunbhoy]

You think he was actually planning to invade somewhere sunny with decent food?

Well no, it is just that Margate is a long way from Hastings.

[thunderlizard]

Yes, but I said March and the invasion wasn't until September. Everybody knows William the Conqueror used to take his mum to visit his nan in Margate every Mother's day.

[shaunbhoy]

Yes, but I said March and the invasion wasn't until September. Everybody knows William the Conqueror used to take his mum to visit his nan in Margate every Mother's day.

But why, having seen Margate, would you ever consider returning, and to Hastings at that? Defies logic.........hence the female "mapreading" suggestion. I reckon he was aiming for the Algarve myself.

[thunderlizard]

You can keep your Costa Brava
and all that palaver
cos I'm telling you mate I'd rather
have a day down Margate with all my family

[thunderlizard]

HMRC

Two things today:
(1) Recorded message "We are experiencing a longer delay than normal in answering your call". No, you are "causing" the delay. It is me that is "experiencing" it.

(2) allocating payments to the wrong tax year & sending me an anrgy reminder.
(a) Does it even matter? Nobody else who runs effectively a credit account with their customers gives a stuff.
(b) If it does matter, can't you see that last year was underpaid by £601.22, and this year is overpaid by £601.22 before any calculations have been even done, and apply a bit of logic?

[gingerjedi]

Two things today:
(1) Recorded message "We are experiencing a longer delay than normal in answering your call". No, you are "causing" the delay. It is me that is "experiencing" it.

(2) allocating payments to the wrong tax year & sending me an anrgy reminder.
(a) Does it even matter? Nobody else who runs effectively a credit account with their customers gives a stuff.
(b) If it does matter, can't you see that last year was underpaid by £601.22, and this year is overpaid by £601.22 before any calculations have been even done, and apply a bit of logic?

They keep chasing me for 80p.

[MaryPoppins]

Two things today also:

1. Rude people.

2. Hangovers. Vicious, soul consuming hangovers.