Just seen an ideal roll in Greggs, but ..

[HairyArsedBloke]

Dammit, why did someone have to mention Greggs?

Now I'm craving a chicken pasty and they're not open today

Yeah, so am I.

Err, you do know we're talking about excrement, here, don't you? I would say if yours is as above, you should seriously consider getting some expert advice.

Now I'm not.

[Sysman]

Get that all the time, its when they're the colour and consistancy of strawberry jam that you have to worry.

I remember a court case from many years ago where the defendant didn't want to tell the court what his job description was.

It turned out he made small wooden chips to put into jam so that it looked as if it had been made from real raspberries, blackberries etc.