WTF is the IMF's problem?

**TimberWolf** · 29 January 2009, 12:15

Mr Darling added: "Yeah, fair enough."

**ratewhore** · 29 January 2009, 12:17

The chancellor said you didn't get it from him but he heard Spain has been giving blow jobs to the IMF in a cubicle in the gents' toilets.

An IMF spokesman said: "Do you really want to know why? Fine. Your banks were the entire basis of your economy and now they're tulipe. Your currency is used bogroll, you don't make anything of any value, you're governed by clueless arseholes and 99% of your population is up to its tits in debt. That's why."

Mr Darling added: "Yeah, fair enough."

The lines between absurdity and reality are drawing ever closer...

**SizeZero** · 29 January 2009, 12:18

An IMF spokesman said: "Do you really want to know why? Fine. Your banks were the entire basis of your economy and now they're sh*te. Your currency is used bogroll, you don't make anything of any value, you're governed by clueless ar$eholes and 99% of your population is up to its t*ts in debt. That's why."

Mr Darling added: "Yeah, fair enough."

Classic

**realityhack** · 29 January 2009, 12:25

I quite like this one as well

RBS TO IMPLODE LIKE HOUSE AT THE END OF 'POLTERGEIST'

THE Royal Bank of Scotland is just days away from imploding like that house in Poltergeist, it was claimed said last night.

As the bank's share price plummeted, experts said it was now time to bring in a scary-voiced midget to expel the remaining demons before the entire structure is then devoured by a tiny black hole.

Economist Tom Logan said: "In Poltergeist terms, the chairs have been stacked, the little girl has been sucked into the TV and the Beast has been exorcised without his annual bonus."

He added: "This once again demonstrates the folly of building a major financial institution on top of an old Indian burial ground."
The biggest implosion will be at the bank's gigantic headquarters in Edinburgh, followed by a series of smaller implosions as RBS and NatWest branches across the country collapse in on themselves and then cease to exist.

The bank is currently advising all its customers to run away from the light, stressing that anyone who runs towards the light does so at their own risk.

An RBS spokesman said: "We are keen to minimise the affects of implosion on our customers but if you happen to be inside one of these branches at the time you will die and it will hurt enormously."

Meanwhile senior Treasury sources insisted the government will wait until the very last moment before buying the remaining 30% of the bank to ensure taxpayers are left with an asset worth precisely **** all.

WTF is the IMF's problem?