Ding dong the wicked witch...

[BrilloPad]

... is out of my life for 5 years today. Yes it is 5 years since my decree absolute - and to celebrate today sees the return of...

The Fabulous Banana Marching Band

and they're playing the ding dong the wicked witch song...







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[EternalOptimist]

If you had celebrated your wedding anniversies with such enthusiasm and aplomb, you might still be married

[beaker]

I particularly like the police escort

[BrilloPad]

If you had celebrated your wedding anniversies with such enthusiasm and aplomb, you might still be married

How do you know what I did on my wedding anniversaries?

You dont read many of my posts do you?

She was a great girl - I loved her and worshipped her. We had 7 years of mostly happy times living together followed by 4 mostly happy years of marriage. Then her kidney packed up - it changed her alot. I suggested children - which I thought would patch things up - BIG mistake. First time she miscarried after 8 weeks - second time was twins. She could not cope with twins despite my offers of help from me or paid help from outside. she suffered big post natal depression - I asked her to go to the doctor - she refused. I said I would go and speak to the doctor - she said she would say I was hitting her. I said I would ignore that - so she said she would say I was abusing the kids!

she then started alot more bullying stuff - which culminated in her calling the police and telling a pack of lies. now the policeman found it laughable - but due to the DV fuss made these days they had to play along.

I moved to my mother's with the kids(she asked me to take the kids!) - then she saw the solicitor and found that the money follows the kids. my solicitor told me to return the kids - at that stage I had no-one to turn to. If only I knew now what I knew then.

I am not so bothered what happened to me - but I don't see why the kids should suffer because she(and the courts) are biased and stupid.

I now have a great girl - I am far happier than I have been in 10 years (since the kidney thing). I look after the kids 4 days per week - not enough but better than most seperated men.

This anniversary is yet another line drawn under a torrid affair of which I am made few mistakes - in fact my only real mistakes were loving her too much and doing too much for her.

Oh yeah - my other mistake was asking Lucy for councelling - that put my recovery back a while...

[BrilloPad]

I particularly like the police escort

One of those bananas is about to dress as spiderman and climb a crane...

[eliquant]

Brillo do you think that when you married her you really 'knew' her or you were a bit blinded by it all and she was 'pretending' to be someone she was not and then when a crisis arrived her true personality came out.

I'm seeing this repeat parttern in alot of couples, there is pretence and bad personality flaws are covered up and after marriage terrible things come out after a couple of years.

[EternalOptimist]

Of course I read your posts, I must have missed a few though.
Its a sad tale you tell, amazing how a personality can change so much following an illness.

[SueEllen]

Brillo do you think that when you married her you really 'knew' her or you were a bit blinded by it all and she was 'pretending' to be someone she was not and then when a crisis arrived her true personality came out.

I'm seeing this repeat parttern in alot of couples, there is pretence and bad personality flaws are covered up and after marriage terrible things come out after a couple of years.

The vicar/minister can always tell.

[BrilloPad]

Brillo do you think that when you married her you really 'knew' her or you were a bit blinded by it all and she was 'pretending' to be someone she was not and then when a crisis arrived her true personality came out.

I'm seeing this repeat parttern in alot of couples, there is pretence and bad personality flaws are covered up and after marriage terrible things come out after a couple of years.

Good question. Thing is I waited 7 years before we got married and then we had 4 good years. She was 20 when we met - I was 25. Obviously people change alot between 20 and 30 - maybe I missed that? but she said she was happy and appear to be happy...

Though it is a good point that sometimes you don't know people until you see them in a crisis. And divorce is a huge crisis for some.

[BrilloPad]

The vicar/minister can always tell.

We get married in Mauritius - what she wanted. Maybe I should have asked...