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The "Er Indoors" thread

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    #11
    Originally posted by DodgyAgent View Post
    "Thank ou thank you thank you . Can I just say what a pleasure it is to be invited to attend this wonderful occasion. I feel humbled just to be here let alone to be awarded the evenings top award."

    "I would like to say that this award is not just about me, and I would particularly like to thank my parents. Whoever and wherever you are "sob" (fighting back the tears) I love you, all three of you. I would also like to thank all my friends and relatives who are unable to make it here tonight to share this wonderful occasion."

    Awards Presenter: "well DA we have a surprise for you, because we have connected through to Belmarsh and brought together all your friends and family into the Belmarsh prison phone box to speak to you directly via video link".... "sebastian Sebastian what's wrong love we are not getting through, what's happening luvvy? what's happening?

    Sebastian "Sorry sir, sorry sir, the contractor video link technician has not turned up, I am trying to get a replacement in quickly "

    Presenter: "Why has he not turned up ?"

    Sebastian "cos he's a typical contractor scumbag.. he's taken a better paid job elsewhere.. "

    Presenter: "doesnt he realise how important tonight is to so many people?"...

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      #12
      Originally posted by DodgyAgent View Post
      I cant argue with her as we have a simmering truce on account of me not getting back from my lunch until 5.00 am this morning.
      Is that all? I did my Christmas thing last weekend:

      - went to the pub at 18:00
      - left pub at 20:00 to go to Kegelbahn
      - left Kegelbahn at 23:00 and went to pub
      - left pub at 04:00 to go to another pub
      - left other pub at 15:25 and walked next door to other pub
      - met missus and order half litre of Apfelwein
      - started to drink and watch footie and missus realised I was drunk as a skunk and dragged me out out at 16:00 and put me to bed
      - Got up next morning and eventually had some food

      Sad, but might do it again today
      Brexit is having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.

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