Thank you for writing to me recently about your problems and I will be happy to reply.
Firstly, yes it is illegal to engage in any form of sexual activity with animals, it's known as bestiality. It is more worrying that you engaged in this activity in the woods near to a public path and with a grey squirrel at that a well known illegal alien, a second cause for concern by the authorities. Thirdly, yes I am surprised to find that your described the squirrel as 'loose' and that you didn't touch the sides, this is called micro penis and I would suggest you see a doctor immediately. And finally, no it doesn't happen to all men, and yes the squirrel probably was laughing.
Please don't write again.
Yours
Deirdre
Firstly, yes it is illegal to engage in any form of sexual activity with animals, it's known as bestiality. It is more worrying that you engaged in this activity in the woods near to a public path and with a grey squirrel at that a well known illegal alien, a second cause for concern by the authorities. Thirdly, yes I am surprised to find that your described the squirrel as 'loose' and that you didn't touch the sides, this is called micro penis and I would suggest you see a doctor immediately. And finally, no it doesn't happen to all men, and yes the squirrel probably was laughing.
Please don't write again.
Yours
Deirdre
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