POCKET DEATH

Re: POCKET DEATH

Does it work on MPs??

POCKET DEATH

Yes! Remember those annoying sound-effect
key rings? Well, now you can get yourself
the very latest in high-tech stress relief.

'POCKET DEATH'. $250 is all you need for a
year's subscription and your free 'Pocket
Death' handset. So when some low-life scum
cuts up up on the motorway, just reach for
your buttons and select either a painful
death or a genuinely unpleasant experience
(not forgetting to enter the victims number
plate). As you do so one of our highly
trained operatives will be paged and move
immediately into action. Among your choices
on the handset:

MACHINE GUN - One of our operators will follow the
subject home and, as they reach for their front
door key, will suddenly send bullets dancing across
the chest of the hated one a'la Saint Valentines
Day Massacre.

HOMEWRECKER - Once our operator has obtained a
photograph of 'that bastard who bought the last
loaf in front of you in the bakers' our art room
will set about creating some very compromising
pictures, a selection of which will be mailed
first class to his or her partner. Sit back and
watch their long term relationship collapse
around their ears.

FREAK OUT - The victim is slipped large amounts of
an untested drug, (usually in their coffee) which
will ensure they, a) attend funerals in Nazi
uniform, b) attack their managing director with a
baseball bat, c) lose all sense of personal hygiene
and finally d) turn into a Jehovahs Witness.

So whether at the shops, at work or buried
in the rush hour traffic, you need never
feel stressful again. You can always take
it out on a member of the public by reaching
for your new pal 'POCKET DEATH'.

Send your money NOW!