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Previously on "There's lots to do and not much time to do it..."

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  • Notascooby
    replied
    Can we follow this with a 3 week rescoping exercise to determine what can be delivered in the next 3 months. Only to realise if you'd not wasted 3 weeks taking all your architects and developers off delivering and sitting round talking baout what you can deliver that you may have finished on time after all. Then to realise that the new scope which is 80% of what you would have delivered if none of the re-scoping had taken place can not be delivered as it was based upon a 3 month window, 3 weeks of which you've pissed away doing the scope.

    Solution - have a further one week rescope to agree to deliver 50% of what you'd have delivered if the management had buggered off and play golf for a month.

    So what happens to the missing 50% - that's phase 1+ - can't call it phase 2 as phase 2 is already scoped and based upon successfully delivering all the functionality of phase 1.

    Round and round we go.......

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Breaking news; three people are now arguing about whether they're allowed to help each other, with one saying they're not, and two saying they won't be able to get something finished if they aren't. All because managerman says they're not allowed to help each other. Brilliant.

    MTT can provide two options;
    - don't help each other, don't finish things and then piss off home before managerman can ask you to do overtime
    - just ignore the silly twunt and get on with it

    I favour the second, but the first would be amusing.

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Issue report

    Issue; Productive work blocked by defective managerman
    Level; Showstopper/Annoyance
    Impact; nothing, I'll invoice anyway
    Detected; several times during the last few months

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by Old Greg View Post
    Raise an issue.
    Maybe I would if I didn't have another gig lined up where they want me to start yesterday.

    As it stands, I just want to go home.

    Leave a comment:


  • Old Greg
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    Just had another meeting and managerman's planned yet another meeting for 4 o'clock. What a useless ****.

    It'll be fun though; he's just instructed us that everyone must work on his own tasks and refuse requests for help from other team members. So at 4 o'clock we will be reporting a complete lack of progress.
    Raise an issue.

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Just had another meeting and managerman's planned yet another meeting for 4 o'clock. What a useless ****.

    It'll be fun though; he's just instructed us that everyone must work on his own tasks and refuse requests for help from other team members. So at 4 o'clock we will be reporting a complete lack of progress.

    Leave a comment:


  • BoredBloke
    replied
    Originally posted by ThomasSoerensen View Post
    This is great.

    Attent the meeting.

    And think of the money!!!!!!

    I recommend an android app called poop salary - it calculates the money you earn while doing something else than working (toilet breaks/meetings/whatever)
    I'm quite capable to doing that without an app. I always aim to get my poo onto my timesheet...so to speak!

    Leave a comment:


  • BoredBloke
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    Yep, but I get my work done. They don't.
    And why would they do your work? They are paying you to do that

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by pacharan View Post
    Don't know why you're complaining, you always seem to have plenty of time on your hands
    Seeing as I have a larger brain than most managers (the simple act of belonging to the homo sapiens species is enough for that), I can easily do my job for a couple of mins at a time and then piss around on CUK for a few mins, and get all my work done.

    Leave a comment:


  • pacharan
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    ...so what do the unskilled, easily replaceable managermen do? They plan some extra meetings to discuss what has to be done 3 times a day. F&*king idiots.
    Don't know why you're complaining, you always seem to have plenty of time on your hands

    Leave a comment:


  • ThomasSoerensen
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    ...so what do the unskilled, easily replaceable managermen do? They plan some extra meetings to discuss what has to be done 3 times a day. F&*king idiots.
    This is great.

    Attent the meeting.

    And think of the money!!!!!!

    I recommend an android app called poop salary - it calculates the money you earn while doing something else than working (toilet breaks/meetings/whatever)

    Leave a comment:


  • Brussels Slumdog
    replied
    Three down two to go.

    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    ...so what do the unskilled, easily replaceable managermen do? They plan some extra meetings to discuss what has to be done 3 times a day. F&*king idiots.
    All meetings thankfully cancelled. One manager marched off the site,one manager's contract not being renewed at the end of July and another manager not renewing her contract. Does anyone have a test script on switching off the lights and locking the door when my contract ends at the end of August?

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by SimonMac View Post
    I assume, like us, they spunk the whole day on internet forums whining how no one else can do their job properly
    Yep, but I get my work done. They don't.

    Leave a comment:


  • SimonMac
    replied
    I assume, like us, they spunk the whole day on internet forums whining how no one else can do their job properly

    Leave a comment:


  • escapeUK
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    ...so what do the unskilled, easily replaceable managermen do? They plan some extra meetings to discuss what has to be done 3 times a day. F&*king idiots.
    This happens everywhere Ive ever worked. Meetings about meetings I used to call it. There's always something that didnt get done, that if the time hadnt been taken by having a meeting about doing it, then it would have been done.

    Leave a comment:

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