Wannaba MAnagement Consultant

[TinTin]

Recommended

What's his other book like - Plundering the Public Sector?

Just as good wendigo. In fact more up-to-date with the recent Gov't IT fiascos.

[The Master]

"Learn your place" - bloody hell

You're not claiming to have been educated at one of the best (i.e. most expensive) public schools now are you Threaded?

Which one? Eaton, Rugby, Gordonstone, Wellington College? Or possibly all of them because you were so fecking brilliant?

Eton
Gordonstoun

[bogeyman]

Word to the wise: you'll find many in the industry are ex-public school types, and with an attitude like that they will tear you to pieces. So my initial advice to you is #learn your place#.

"Learn your place" - bloody hell

You're not claiming to have been educated at one of the best (i.e. most expensive) public schools now are you Threaded?

Which one? Eaton, Rugby, Gordonstone, Wellington College? Or possibly all of them because you were so fecking brilliant?

You always seem to assume that everyone's place is at least one rung below the one you're clinging to on the ladder of life.

To the original poster. Don't worry about those (k)nobs - most of them can only tear a bit of bog paper while wiping their arses without Nanny to assist them - never mind tearing you to pieces.

I've worked with loads of them. My old firm Logi(something or other) used to trawl 'Oxbridge' every year back in the 80's and brought in lots of useless grad trainees that I had to take under my wing.

Of course, they were charged out to clients even though they were being trained on the job. Most if them were dismally thick, but the 'right sort of chap' (i.e. Daddy well-connected and rich).

Most of them couldn't even add-up or multiply reliably (in the mathmatical sense - they have no probem at all multiplying in the procreative sense, it seems).

The clients were pissed off having to pay for these double-barrelled-idiots, and it made me look bad to the client as they were supposedly part of my 'team'.

I started a game with the other technical leads called 'whack the toff' - didn't actually hit them but had a poll for people to vote how often and how hard they'd like to whack a particular graduate trainee, and why.

Winner was invariably a young Master Jeremy Kennedy-Sloan (I kid you not) for having completed a Comp-Sci degree without knowing how to add up or subtract in hex!

Happy days

[wendigo100]

Before you decide, I suggest you get hold of a copy of David Craig's latest book : Rip-Off ! (The scandalous inside story of the management consulting money machine).

What's his other book like - Plundering the Public Sector?

[TinTin]

Think about it

Before you decide, I suggest you get hold of a copy of David Craig's latest book : Rip-Off ! (The scandalous inside story of the management consulting money machine). You will be amazed, as I was (and I have worked for and alongside some of the biggest rip-off merchants of the industr). If you can thrive in the low-life, lying, cheating, thieving and back-stabbing environment they operate, I'll take my hat off to you. Having said that, I have now more respect for estate and recruitment agents than any of those shysters.

[Cyber Controller]

Is this indicative of graduate intellect and grasp of English language?

I guess we should at least be thankful it wasn't written in txtspk.

[Scaroth of the Jagaroth]

Just remember the motto of all true management consultants and you'll do fine:

"If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem."

[Mordac]

Hi all

I've been looking tinto becoming a management consultant and wanted to get a real view of what it's like. I ve just applied for their grad scheme at Capgemini and looking to other grad schemes. I've been working self-employed pretty much since leaving uni in 2002, and the way they sell this job is entrepreneurial in nature and project based, which sounds great to me, but what's it really like??

I know about the long hrs- working for myself I'm used to working 16hrs a day- tick.
Staying away from home- me likes variety. tick.

I hope that I haven't got a rosey view of this industry, so need some facts.

Thanks all.


ps I've heard about these public school boy toffs. Something to worry about, or am I really gonna be slapping someone instead?

Most of the management consultants I've met (and I did 2 contracts at a big one and one contract at a very big one) have been utter feckwits who have been trained to do two things, sit in on meetings without betraying their complete ignorance, and fu.ck up the project just enough so it drags on without actually giving the game away (thereby earning more of those all-important fees).
In theory you ought to have some form of real-world experience or useful skill to become a management consultant, but please don't let that put you off, I'm sure CrapGemini can find a job for you buggering up the Home Office or something.

Oh, I get it. This is a wind-up isn't it? It's Sprite Boy, surely, that grammar is a dead giveaway.

[VectraMan]

Management consultant exam:

Q1. Do you have anything useful to contribute to industry or society in general?

Q2. Are you willing and able to lie convincingly to potential employers about how you can make a valuable contribution, and that you work hard to acheive it, when it's blantantly obvious that neither are remotely true and you're only there to leach off the hard work of others whilst simultaneously hindering their work?

If you answered no, then yes, then congratulations you have what it takes to be a management consultant. And if you're really good you might progress onto recruitment consultancy.

If you answered differently, then bad news, you're going to have to work for a living.

[Gold Dalek]

Hi all

I've been looking tinto becoming a management consultant and wanted to get a real view of what it's like. I ve just applied for their grad scheme at Capgemini and looking to other grad schemes. I've been working self-employed pretty much since leaving uni in 2002, and the way they sell this job is entrepreneurial in nature and project based, which sounds great to me, but what's it really like??

I know about the long hrs- working for myself I'm used to working 16hrs a day- tick.
Staying away from home- me likes variety. tick.

I hope that I haven't got a rosey view of this industry, so need some facts.

Thanks all.


ps I've heard about these public school boy toffs. Something to worry about, or am I really gonna be slapping someone instead?

Is this indicative of graduate intellect and grasp of English language?

[threaded]

ps I've heard about these public school boy toffs. Something to worry about, or am I really gonna be slapping someone instead?

Word to the wise: you'll find many in the industry are ex-public school types, and with an attitude like that they will tear you to pieces. So my initial advice to you is #learn your place#.

[WannabeMconsultant]

Hi all

I've been looking tinto becoming a management consultant and wanted to get a real view of what it's like. I ve just applied for their grad scheme at Capgemini and looking to other grad schemes. I've been working self-employed pretty much since leaving uni in 2002, and the way they sell this job is entrepreneurial in nature and project based, which sounds great to me, but what's it really like??

I know about the long hrs- working for myself I'm used to working 16hrs a day- tick.
Staying away from home- me likes variety. tick.

I hope that I haven't got a rosey view of this industry, so need some facts.

Thanks all.


ps I've heard about these public school boy toffs. Something to worry about, or am I really gonna be slapping someone instead?