Old Greg's Health Clinic is open - Contractor UK Bulletin Board

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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 10:29
Originally posted by sasguru View Post

I seem to be addicted to skewering the village idiots on CUK with my rapier wit. Can you help?

You may be brain-stem dead. Have a look at: Welcome to Map of Medicine for NHS Evidence, and report back.
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darmstadt replied

26 July 2011, 10:29
Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post

I seem to have been afflicted with a horrible unslightly red growth on the top of my head. Is it a disease or am I addicted to hair dyes?

Churchill

You have turned into Mick Hucknall and are now considered a knob
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shaunbhoy replied

26 July 2011, 10:24
Originally posted by sasguru View Post

I seem to be the village idiot on CUK. Can you help?

ftfy
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sasguru replied

26 July 2011, 10:21
I seem to be addicted to skewering the village idiots on CUK with my rapier wit. Can you help?
Leave a comment:
fullyautomatix replied

26 July 2011, 10:20
Why are NHS spending my millions on these stupid websites ?

All they need is one web page where they prescribe a randomly selected painkiller or anti depressant and the jobs done.
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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 10:11
Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post

I have recently found that my supplier of good quality 'skunk', a small girl with a baby is no longer able to sell me any.

Can you recommend a new dealer?

This is a health clinic. You may want to consider therap for your multiple addictions.
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MarillionFan replied

26 July 2011, 10:10
I have recently found that my supplier of good quality 'skunk', a small girl with a baby is no longer able to sell me any.

Can you recommend a new dealer?
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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 10:07
Originally posted by Platypus View Post

I haven't been feeling well recently (see pic).

What do you think it could be ?

MF on a good day. A decent coke binge will return him to normal.
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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 10:07
Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post

I seem to have been afflicted with a horrible unslightly red growth on the top of my head. Is it a disease or am I addicted to hair dyes?

Churchill

Hmmm. Are you experiencing any blood loss in the affected area?
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MarillionFan replied

26 July 2011, 10:04
I seem to have been afflicted with a horrible unslightly red growth on the top of my head. Is it a disease or am I addicted to hair dyes?

Churchill
Leave a comment:
Platypus replied

26 July 2011, 10:01
I haven't been feeling well recently (see pic).

What do you think it could be ?
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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 09:03
Originally posted by zeitghost

Can you confirm that you're not a bricklayer too?

I'll have to ask you move along now. This is a place of healing, not of idle chitter chatter.
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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 08:54
Originally posted by James Tiberius Kirk View Post

A boulder on the head may help to alleviate the symptoms

I'm a doctor Jim, not a miracle worker.
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James Tiberius Kirk replied

26 July 2011, 08:52
Originally posted by zeitghost

I have this terrible pain in my chest & I keep spitting up diamonds.

Do you have any idea what may have caused this?

Google doesn't seem to help.

TIA.

A boulder on the head may help to alleviate the symptoms
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Old Greg replied

26 July 2011, 08:52
Originally posted by zeitghost

I have this terrible pain in my chest & I keep spitting up diamonds.

Do you have any idea what may have caused this?

Google doesn't seem to help.

TIA.

This is outside of my competence. You need to see an astrobiologist. Sorry I cannot be more help.
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