Reply to: I can hear someone's HR assessment in the next room

[Mich the Tester]

Something like that. I got through to the second round with them, but it clashed with an important boat race, and their unwillingness to reschedule it demonstrated their crazy sense of priorities, so I dropped out.
The other thing I remember about that maths test was that the room was arranged to look out over their massive trading floor, a bit like a hospitality box at the football. One of the traders came out and announced to the whole place that he'd just weighed himself and exceeded 25 stone for the first time, and got a round of applause.

Sounds a bit like my 'management talent recruitment day' at Andersen Insulting; I fell asleep during a presentation and was asked to leave. I remain eternally grateful.

[Zippy]

One of the traders came out and announced to the whole place that he'd just weighed himself and exceeded 25 stone for the first time, and got a round of applause.

Looking on the bright side - he's probably dead by now.

[Old Greg]

Something like that. I got through to the second round with them, but it clashed with an important boat race, and their unwillingness to reschedule it demonstrated their crazy sense of priorities, so I dropped out.
The other thing I remember about that maths test was that the room was arranged to look out over their massive trading floor, a bit like a hospitality box at the football. One of the traders came out and announced to the whole place that he'd just weighed himself and exceeded 25 stone for the first time, and got a round of applause.

You wouldn't get much sleep while he's squeezing out a mushy one in the next cubicle.

[thunderlizard]

I bet you were attracted by an advert reading something like
"Looking for a great working environment, cheerful, friendly colleagues and management that prioritizes your career development?"

Something like that. I got through to the second round with them, but it clashed with an important boat race, and their unwillingness to reschedule it demonstrated their crazy sense of priorities, so I dropped out.
The other thing I remember about that maths test was that the room was arranged to look out over their massive trading floor, a bit like a hospitality box at the football. One of the traders came out and announced to the whole place that he'd just weighed himself and exceeded 25 stone for the first time, and got a round of applause.

[Old Greg]

Having other buildings on the campus helps. “I am off the building XX” and instead one goes to the Japanese massage parlor for an hour.

I find that nobody in the building knowing what you do is helpful as well.

[Mich the Tester]

In my last year at uni I applied for a few investment bank graduate trainee programmes. At Salomon Smith Barney I was one of several candidates doing a maths test in a meeting room. We could hear the conversation in the room next door, in which a woman was crying and a man was shouting "stop bloody snivelling!" at her. We looked inquiringly at the HR people running the maths test, who pretended it wasn't happening. I really wish I'd barged in and told him he was spoiling my concentration.

I bet you were attracted by an advert reading something like
"Looking for a great working environment, cheerful, friendly colleagues and management that prioritizes your career development?"

[Paddy]

Lots of people think they're alone in this, because corporate life demands that people demonstrate how 'busy' they are all the time. Many are not busy at all; they've planned meetings so they can bugger off for an hour or so, they fill up their outlook calendar to make it look like they're blocked full of work or they always carry important pieces of paper and walk briskly to the next coffee machine.

Having other buildings on the campus helps. “I am off the building XX” and instead one goes to the Japanese massage parlor for an hour.

[thunderlizard]

In my last year at uni I applied for a few investment bank graduate trainee programmes. At Salomon Smith Barney I was one of several candidates doing a maths test in a meeting room. We could hear the conversation in the room next door, in which a woman was crying and a man was shouting "stop bloody snivelling!" at her. We looked inquiringly at the HR people running the maths test, who pretended it wasn't happening. I really wish I'd barged in and told him he was spoiling my concentration.

[Mich the Tester]

Bloody hell man. I thjought I was the only person in the whole world who regularly had a kip in the bogs at work. At one client, I even had an inflatable neck pillow stuffed behind the cistern for my daily snooze. Glad to know I'm really not the only one.

Lots of people think they're alone in this, because corporate life demands that people demonstrate how 'busy' they are all the time. Many are not busy at all; they've planned meetings so they can bugger off for an hour or so, they fill up their outlook calendar to make it look like they're blocked full of work or they always carry important pieces of paper and walk briskly to the next coffee machine.

[Old Greg]

Bloody hell man. I thjought I was the only person in the whole world who regularly had a kip in the bogs at work. At one client, I even had an inflatable neck pillow stuffed behind the cistern for my daily snooze. Glad to know I'm really not the only one.

Doesn't everyone do this?

And sorry about the pillow that time they ran out of loo roll.

[TestMangler]

You've never read any Health & Safety policies, have you?

I've not met a permie ******* but I have certainly heard them. However, as I've been trying to sleep in the next cubicle at the time, I've hardly been in a position to complain.

Bloody hell man. I thjought I was the only person in the whole world who regularly had a kip in the bogs at work. At one client, I even had an inflatable neck pillow stuffed behind the cistern for my daily snooze. Glad to know I'm really not the only one.

[Old Greg]

You've never met a permie ****** ??????

Although, I can see your point about direction and control. They can tell him when and where to wank, but not how to wank

You've never read any Health & Safety policies, have you?

I've not met a permie ******* but I have certainly heard them. However, as I've been trying to sleep in the next cubicle at the time, I've hardly been in a position to complain.

[Doggy Styles]

Can't I make do with slurping my coffee instead?

That's exactly what I sound like anyway while masterbating.

[Old Greg]

Can't you help the poor guy by shoulting some suggested responses.

You could be like the audience in Play Your Cards Right.

Higher, lower, not in this game.

[EternalOptimist]

do a loud cough bollocks cough, every time the HR guy chirps up. that should cheer the permie up no end