Speaking to orange chumps

[Mailman]

I saw the stuff your momma gives you fungarse

Mailman

[Fungus]

And you two are the perfect examples of why service is a dirty four letter word in this country

Bend over the apple cart and take it like a man eh!

Mailman

Have you stopped taking your medication? It's for your own good you know. And ours.

[Mailman]

That would require the ability to read and understand written English, something the poor mite has a hard time with.

And you two are the perfect examples of why service is a dirty four letter word in this country

Bend over the apple cart and take it like a man eh!

Mailman

[The Lone Gunman]

Point out to them that at the point you signed the contract you gave them twelve (or six or eighteen) months notice as the expirey date was clearly stated at the time. That should do it.

Got an agent with that one when I didnt renew and he decided not to pay me for the last month.

[Fungus]

Most mobile phones require a 30 day notice period. I bet you just didn't look hard enough at your contract.

That would require the ability to read and understand written English, something the poor mite has a hard time with.

[sasguru]

Mailman - My contract finishes tomorrow, is there anything I need to do before then?

Orange Chumps (OC, with heavy Indian accent) - Yes sir, you need to give us 30 days notice.

Mailman - For what?

OC - That you want to end your contract.

Mailman - Why am I doing that, my contract quite clearly says that the final day for the contractual relationship between Orange and myself ends on the 22nd.

OC - The T&C's says you have to give us 30 days notice if you want to leave Orange.

Mailman - No they dont, the contract says our contract ends tomorrow.

OC - Sorry sir, you have to give us 30 days.

Mailman - Im looking at the contract now, there is no mention of a 30 day notice period!

OC - Sorry sir, our T&C's are clear that you have to give us 30 days.

Mailman - So clear that I cant see? Let me speak to a supervisor.

OC - There are none here.

Mailman - Is there a number I can call to speak to a supervisor?

OC - No sir, we will have to call you back.

For fecks sake...why is nothing in this country straight forward!

No wonder you feckers no longer rule the world!

Mailman

Most mobile phone cos. require a 30 day notice period. I bet you just didn't look hard enough at your contract.

[John Galt]

Best one I had was with Vodafone when I moved to another company. Went like this...

Vodafone called......This is Vodafone can you please confirm your address and postcode and full name please

JG.....nope

Vodafone......But we have something important to tell you

JG.....so tell me

Vodafone....We can't without confirming your details

JG.....so don't tell me then, I don't mind

Vodafone......but we have to

JF.....so just tell me

This went on for about 20 minutes until I pointed out that data protection forbade me from releasing the information they asked for - that stumped 'em

[BoredBloke]

I Tried to get a pair of handsets through them on the company because they offered free calls between both sets. I was asked for a purchase order which was refused on the grounds that I hadn't provided enough info. They wouldn't tell me what info they needed and so I started a game of 20 questions. I sent another bigger one which was again declined. This time I was told that the company bank account didn't exist and neither did the company.

In the end I sacked it. They truly are a complete waste of space and I would never consider them in the future.

[thunderlizard]

The Orange are famous for being uncompromising and uncooperative.

Just ask the residents of the Garvaghy Road, Portadown.

[ratewhore]

reminds me of when i spoke to Easycar customer services. Their phoneline is something like a pound a minute and i found there was only 1 person there with no supervisor. I made him tell me the direct office number which the staff use then posted it on the internet.

And that was before the call centre went to India...

[Mailman]

Mailman - My contract finishes tomorrow, is there anything I need to do before then?

Orange Chumps (OC, with heavy Indian accent) - Yes sir, you need to give us 30 days notice.

Mailman - For what?

OC - That you want to end your contract.

Mailman - Why am I doing that, my contract quite clearly says that the final day for the contractual relationship between Orange and myself ends on the 22nd.

OC - The T&C's says you have to give us 30 days notice if you want to leave Orange.

Mailman - No they dont, the contract says our contract ends tomorrow.

OC - Sorry sir, you have to give us 30 days.

Mailman - Im looking at the contract now, there is no mention of a 30 day notice period!

OC - Sorry sir, our T&C's are clear that you have to give us 30 days.

Mailman - So clear that I cant see? Let me speak to a supervisor.

OC - There are none here.

Mailman - Is there a number I can call to speak to a supervisor?

OC - No sir, we will have to call you back.

For fecks sake...why is nothing in this country straight forward!

No wonder you feckers no longer rule the world!

Mailman