Great riposte

[RichardCranium]

And what was wrong with just turning and going 'oi you ******* twat' in an overtly aggressive manner?

It's not quite in the Oscar Wilde league for scathing wit and biting satire that I like to aspire to.

(And just 'cos I can't attain it, it doesn't stop me aspiring.)

Edit: Actually, I wouldn't say that in case he hit me. I'm not big on pain.

[MarillionFan]

And what was wrong with just turning and going 'oi you ******* twat' in an overtly aggressive manner?

[RichardCranium]

Walking through the town centre yesterday I passed a red-headed mum pushing her red-headed son (so I presume they were mother and son) in a wheelchair. He was about 19, emaciated, and she looked like she hadn't had a decent night's sleep in months.

A bit further on two teenage lads were swaggering toward me, one with a birthmark on his face. As we passed, this lad hit me with his shoulder on purpose, as teenagers are wont to do.

Instantly - and unusually - a brilliant response occurred to me. I turned, he stopped and turned and said "Wot?" and I said:

"Look, about 50 yards ahead of you is a red-headed lad in a wheelchair being pushed by his mum. He's only a couple of years older than you and he is clearly dying. You being angry with the world because of a birthmark is pointless, we all have our weaknesses and faults, yours is just a bit more visible than most. So think of that poor lad in the wheelchair. He's got it really bad. He's ginger."


Unfortunately, the lad didn't really turn and say "Wot?", and so I didn't get to use the brilliant riposte. It all only happened in my head. Such a shame.

[gingerjedi]

BBC News - Harriet Harman says 'ginger rodent' comment was wrong

Harperson: "But there is one ginger rodent which we never want to see again - Danny Alexander."

Alexander: "rodents do valuable work cleaning up mess others leave behind".

Well done that man.