Reply to: French say terror attack in UK "highly likely"

[EternalOptimist]

Here I sit all broken hearted, I lit the fuse and only farted.

some come here to kiss and date
some come here for nooky
but I come here to detonate
and blow us all to f*cky

[Mich the Tester]

How about some Al Qaeda chat up lines?

I've got a bomb in my underpants. (Perhaps not!)
Is that a stick of gelignite in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Here I sit all broken hearted, I lit the fuse and only farted.

[SupremeSpod]

At least the Irish lot were reasonably competent. They actually managed to blow up other people and get away unscathed. I have a feeling that Al-Qaeda have run out of competent terrorists prepared to blow themselves up and the only ones they have left are f**kwits that set fire to their own undies or stick dynamite up their own arses. They haven't really been on form for the last 5 years or so.

Not entirely true.

[EternalOptimist]

How about some Al Qaeda chat up lines?

I've got a bomb in my underpants. (Perhaps not!)
Is that a stick of gelignite in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Rhianna - 'here is a little miniature of me in a burkha on the London tube'
Ishmael - 'thats so cute, I'll have it blown up'

[mudskipper]

At least the Irish lot were reasonably competent. They actually managed to blow up other people and get away unscathed. I have a feeling that Al-Qaeda have run out of competent terrorists prepared to blow themselves up and the only ones they have left are f**kwits that set fire to their own undies or stick dynamite up their own arses. They haven't really been on form for the last 5 years or so.

How about some Al Qaeda chat up lines?

I've got a bomb in my underpants. (Perhaps not!)
Is that a stick of gelignite in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

[wobbegong]

At least the Irish lot were reasonably competent. They actually managed to blow up other people and get away unscathed. I have a feeling that Al-Qaeda have run out of competent terrorists prepared to blow themselves up and the only ones they have left are f**kwits that set fire to their own undies or stick dynamite up their own arses. They haven't really been on form for the last 5 years or so.

These are people that haven't even thought their own afterlife through properly. Who'd want to spend eternity with 72 virgins? They're going to be either old, ugly or geeks. Still, on the up side, you never know, there may be some ladies too.

[Zippy]

like scientologists.

Actually, why can't they start their religious war with them instead...

scientologists with expensive lawyers VS islamic extremists with flammable underpants

now that would be amusing

It might work better the other way round?

[Saddo]

scientologists with expensive lawyers VS islamic extremists with flammable underpants

Do the undies need to be flammable though? I mean, a couple of sticks of gelignite keeping your wedding tackle company wouldn't appear to be influenced by the combustability of the surrounding garments.

[CheeseSlice]

Yes, of course there is. Imagine these people cared more about their religious beliefs than countries or borders, for example. You may not think it logical but you could accept that they do.

like scientologists.

Actually, why can't they start their religious war with them instead...

scientologists with expensive lawyers VS islamic extremists with flammable underpants

now that would be amusing

[Troll]

So why in the name of all that's holy didn't the rest of you give them it?

I suppose we should have seen the shape of things to come with the burning of bookshops when Rushdie Satanic Verses was published

Seems we can tolerate pretty well anything

[Mich the Tester]

What I don't understand is what these "terrorists" are hoping to achieve. At least with the Northern Ireland and Spain campaigns in years gone by they had a mission which went along the lines of wanting to create their own country. But with the current lot I just don't know what they would measure as success.

At least the Irish lot were reasonably competent. They actually managed to blow up other people and get away unscathed. I have a feeling that Al-Qaeda have run out of competent terrorists prepared to blow themselves up and the only ones they have left are f**kwits that set fire to their own undies or stick dynamite up their own arses. They haven't really been on form for the last 5 years or so.

[Mich the Tester]

So, beware of ze Al-Quaiedaux wiz ze French accents. Zey vill place a beum in ze beus or le train. Or 'opefully, in ze par-lia-ment. And zen zey vill drink champagne and steal ze oysters from ze Fortnum et Masons and 'ave a great feast as ze infidel beurns.

Allez les bleus!

[EternalOptimist]

So why in the name of all that's holy didn't the rest of you give them it?

<cough> we did <cough>

there was even a peace treaty

article 1 sub clause 3 'whities will not pee in the mosque doorway on a saturday night'
article 7 clause 1 'we will not spit in the curry'

[Mich the Tester]

Back in the 1980's they were agitating for their own autonomous region in the NE of England....

So why in the name of all that's holy didn't the rest of you give them it?

[Troll]

What I don't understand is what these "terrorists" are hoping to achieve. At least with the Northern Ireland and Spain campaigns in years gone by they had a mission which went along the lines of wanting to create their own country. But with the current lot I just don't know what they would measure as success.

Back in the 1980's they were agitating for their own autonomous region in the NE of England....suppose it's spread a bit wider these days