Reply to: HR? Effin Clueless!

[gingerjedi]

At Hawkers, when it was still with us, you could only ask for replacements. So I found a broken stapler in a 2nd hand shop and sent that in with my request for a stapler. :-)

You're Milton from 'Office Space' and I claim my Swingline SE.

[norrahe]

It could be a combination of lack of toilet paper or the possibility of redundancies.

[RichardCranium]

I was in my early twenties when working for a quango I learned the expression "paperclip management". The twonk in question was known as 'Bike Modem' and he was a rapidly rising star. His only two competencies were back-stabbing and allowing junior blondes to shag him in exchange for promotion to Project Analyst roles. (Yes, Bendy Wendy, I mean you.)

I really have worked with awful management; 15 years in the public sector plus another 5 in huge corporate integrators does that for you.

But you really know you have scraped the bottom of the barrel when a fairly senior manager starts worrying about the stationery budget. It is a sign that the organisation has not just lost the plot, they've lost the will to find it too.

Churchill, don't get upset and instead just enjoy watching the train slowly crash. It's not you, it really is them.

[Churchill]

There is something about being tied to an alter , made to drink a cup of fake blood, then being sh@gged by a line of guys wearing ceremonial robes and goat masks that appeals to women.

I will tell you a secret that I learned twenty tears ago. Women are worse than fellers

Not news to me.

[EternalOptimist]

A friend of mine joined a Coven just for the sex - she loved it.

There is something about being tied to an alter , made to drink a cup of fake blood, then being sh@gged by a line of guys wearing ceremonial robes and goat masks that appeals to women.

I will tell you a secret that I learned twenty tears ago. Women are worse than fellers

[Churchill]

heh heh.

Have you noticed the 7 ages of HR females.

1 Gap year, bright eyed bushy tailed zealots, nymphs
2 Graduate, serious well meaning, booby acolytes
3 Shocked, suspicious, still would
4 Experienced, hardened, bruisers
5 Toughened, vindictive, sagging
6 Shreiking, nasty, witchlike
7 Bitter, twisted, Harpies

You've described the 7 ages of an ex-wife there! Uncanny!

[EternalOptimist]

Coven

heh heh.

Have you noticed the 7 ages of HR females.

1 Gap year, bright eyed bushy tailed zealots, nymphs
2 Graduate, serious well meaning, booby acolytes
3 Shocked, suspicious, still would
4 Experienced, hardened, bruisers
5 Toughened, vindictive, sagging
6 Shreiking, nasty, witchlike
7 Bitter, twisted, Harpies

[Churchill]

A coven, in an Alan Clark way? There is much to recommend them.

A friend of mine joined a Coven just for the sex - she loved it.

[threaded]

Coven

A coven, in an Alan Clark way? There is much to recommend them.

[threaded]

damn those HR teasers.

it's horde by the way. a horde of HR teasers

Yi tinke my haz det rikti:

The horde in HR had a hoard of stationary.

[Churchill]

damn those HR teasers.

it's horde by the way. a horde of HR teasers

Coven

[EternalOptimist]

We've been here before...

I tied a brown label to the stapler with the request ID written on it.

Yes, I had to request a label from one of the secretaries who had a hoard of them, and beg a bit of string of another, cut with scissors borrowed from a third. I think they were just teasing me though.

damn those HR teasers.

it's horde by the way. a horde of HR teasers

[Churchill]

We've been here before...

I tied a brown label to the stapler with the request ID written on it.

Yes, I had to request a label from one of the secretaries who had a hoard of them, and beg a bit of string of another, cut with scissors borrowed from a third. I think they were just teasing me though.

[threaded]

How did you make sure that the request didn't get separated from the stapler?

We've been here before...

I tied a brown label to the stapler with the request ID written on it.

Yes, I had to request a label from one of the secretaries who had a hoard of them, and beg a bit of string of another, cut with scissors borrowed from a third. I think they were just teasing me though.

[Churchill]

Did you promise to only use while moving?

Apparently, Simon is pissed off because his Stationery is not Stationary!

His spelling, not mine. Hence the use of [sic].