Spider Spider

Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

You are not logged in or you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

You are not logged in. If you are already registered, fill in the form below to log in, or follow the "Sign Up" link to register a new account.
You may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
If you are trying to post, the administrator may have disabled your account, or it may be awaiting activation.

RichardCranium replied

27 October 2009, 16:06
Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post

I made my excuses and left,

Oh, EO. Where can I buy your book(s)?
Leave a comment:
EternalOptimist replied

27 October 2009, 16:05
Originally posted by thunderlizard View Post

Must have been freaking massive! But how did you know it was female?

Because a black widow eats her mate after sex.
And we all know what bit she saves till last
Leave a comment:
thunderlizard replied

27 October 2009, 16:02
Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post

The spider was quite large, and as I was working out what to do about it, she leaned down close to my ear.

Must have been freaking massive! But how did you know it was female?
Leave a comment:
EternalOptimist started a topic Spider Spider

27 October 2009, 15:57
Spider Spider

I have a week off and one of the neighbours just came over. Her husband left a few years ago and she was in a state.
She had obviously been in the bath or about to get in because she had her bathrobe and a cap on. Anyways, there was a massive spider in the bath, would I do the honours, blah blah.
So we went over the road, and I noticed she closed the front door behind us, I thought I heard the bolt too. The spider was quite large, and as I was working out what to do about it, she leaned down close to my ear. Her perfume was strong and her milky white breasts were straining at the fabric of the robe in an effort to break free. She was breathing heavily as she whispered huskily into my ear, 'how can I ever repay you'. Her pendulous globes were now clearly visible and her cleavage was truly spectacular as I realised she had nothing at all on, under the robe. Her musky scent assailed my nostrils.

I made my excuses and left, how on earth could anyone kn0b a bird who can't tell the difference between a plastic spider and a real one ?
Tags: None