Oh Good Grief

[Jabberwocky]

Told her bottom was £25 for 8 hours a day)

Some agents will try and sell anything. Still at that price she won't be able to sit down for weeks.

[Joe Black]

VBA And Crystal Reports....

...surely though skills like VBA and Crystal can't be considered top rung (even managers can use them!), so its not surprising if they offer low rates?

[zathras]

Just phoned an agent about a simple Crystal role up the road. Little below my usual rate but I though £300pd for a couple of weeks up the road was great. But I had been beaten to it.

A contractor had been placed. The agent said to me - Yeah he's written 10000 reports - have you?

"Errr No?" was the reply.
"Oh well he has"
"How much did you place this whizz for then?"
"£220 p/d and the next one only wanted £200"
"Oh Ok. Cant compete with that. Was his name Billy?" - I asked
"What Billy Whizz?"
"No Billy Bulltulipter!"
"Why" Asked the naive agent.

Well work it out. 10000 reports at 1 hour a report(bear minimum) is over 5 years of work with no toilet breaks, lunch, holidays etc etc at 100% utilization with no meetings and someone that good aint gonna charge that.

"Sniff sniff. I smell BULLtulip"

I got called about a role needing VBA And Crystal Reports yesterday in WC1. They wanted to pay £20 p/hr. (well it's either that or cry). Told her bottom was £25 for 8 hours a day)

[Jabberwocky]

PS can you help my missus with "the ethics of public speaking for personal gain" problem that I have?

A thinly veiled reference to your penile dysfunction no doubt. Perhaps you should think of all those contractors you have screwed over the years whilst you are in the saddle. Seems to give most agents a stiffy.

Dr. Jabber

[DodgyAgent]

Businessethics

Let me quote you from the DodgyAgent book of ethics.

The agency can tell you whatever it likes, it is up to the government regulator to enforce standards. If an agency commits major fraud then that is sound business practice right up to the moment the company gets caught. If it doesn't get caught then the fraud becomes Best Practice if it makes a lot of wonga.

Listen sausageJockey or whatever your name is, my book of business ethics does not sell itself to recruitment agencies particularly well. My best clients are banks, pharmaceutical companies, Insurance companies, retailers and food manufacturers. Another favourite customer is procurement departments within the public sector. I even have a signed copy of my own book from Tony Blair and on it says:

"Dodgy thanks for helping me to sell the WMD idea to the dopey British public, without your book I could never have done it"

PS can you help my missus with "the ethics of public speaking for personal gain" problem that I have?

[MarillionFan]

MF,

Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't you mention you would be on Dragon's Den.

So was that you with the roller knee pads ?

Yeh. Did my pitch last week. Should be on next.

It was for a special re-inforced wrist band designed especially for w@nkers. But even though they said it was a good idea they didnt think that the market was big enough as I had only identified certain members of www.contractoruk.co.uk.

[partimer]

what are you up to ?

MF,

Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't you mention you would be on Dragon's Den.

So was that you with the roller knee pads ?

[Fleetwood]

Still on the bench.
Been put forward for a few things starting Jan 2006, and there's a plan B as well.
Mme. Fleetwood is working at the moment, which is slightly better than nothing. Must rush, as I have to get the kids from school.

F in "House-husband" mode

[milanbenes]

Fleet,

how's it going ?

Milan.

[Fleetwood]

bare minimum

[Jabberwocky]

Let me quote you from the DodgyAgent book of ethics.

The agency can tell you whatever it likes, it is up to the government regulator to enforce standards. If an agency commits major fraud then that is sound business practice right up to the moment the company gets caught. If it doesn't get caught then the fraud becomes Best Practice if it makes a lot of wonga.

[milanbenes]

you take contracts for two weeks duration at 300 gbp per day !!!

monkey !

Milan.

[wc2]

Just shows how some agents know less than a newborn baby.

[MarillionFan]

Just phoned an agent about a simple Crystal role up the road. Little below my usual rate but I though £300pd for a couple of weeks up the road was great. But I had been beaten to it.

A contractor had been placed. The agent said to me - Yeah he's written 10000 reports - have you?

"Errr No?" was the reply.
"Oh well he has"
"How much did you place this whizz for then?"
"£220 p/d and the next one only wanted £200"
"Oh Ok. Cant compete with that. Was his name Billy?" - I asked
"What Billy Whizz?"
"No Billy Bulltulipter!"
"Why" Asked the naive agent.

Well work it out. 10000 reports at 1 hour a report(bear minimum) is over 5 years of work with no toilet breaks, lunch, holidays etc etc at 100% utilization with no meetings and someone that good aint gonna charge that.

"Sniff sniff. I smell BULLtulip"