Some years ago, I interviewed a "Bob Shawadiwadi" for a 1st line support role in the company where I worked.
I had to rapidly draw the interview to a close, because, quite frankly, I couldn't breathe the air any longer in the room. It wasn't B.O. but it was just vile, whatever it was.
I would have called the interview anyway, because he mentioned that he had seen our company website and produced his own, improved mock-ups using sheets of white A4 and crayons (I kid you not).
His personal interests were Bacterial Microbiology (in which he had a Masters degree from an Indian Uni). Quite why he wanted to work as a 1st line support person in a company that provided equipment to the Met Police was beyond me. However, it was about 2 weeks after the incidents in the US when envelopes containing white powder were being sent to the White House.
Anyway, he was just not suitable for the role, and I followed with a rejection letter the same day.
The next day, in the afternoon, the company sec put a call through to me from Mr Shawadiwadi.
Thinking that he wants some constructive feedback, I decide to accept the call and try to help.
It's Mr Shawadiwadi all right. Just not Bob. It's his fecking brother, who angrily wants to know why I have declined his most excellent brother from working at the company. In the background, I hear the extended family gnashing and wailing their teeth, egging Bob's brother on.
After much explanation, I finally manage to get through to Bob's brother that Bob was unsuitable.
He pauses for a few moments, then delivers the punchline.
"Perhaps you are thinking of taking me instead then ?"
I hung up and took an extended lunch break with a note to the company sec not to forward any more calls from Mr Shawadiwadi or his tribe for the rest of eternity.
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Reply to: Bob Shawadiwadi’s evil salesman uncle
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Previously on "Bob Shawadiwadi’s evil salesman uncle"
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Actually, his ‘England language’ was OK. He didn’t sound like that, but he was stuck in his script about cost savings in software delivery.
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Bob Shawadiwadi’s evil salesman uncle
Just had him on the phone – twice.
The first time I said I wasn’t interested and hung up. The fraker phoned me back.
I gave him a lesson in anglo-saxon and hung up again, but took the phone off the hook.
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